


Fetish

by Shinigamibutter



Category: ASTRO (Band)
Genre: Bottom Mj, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dom/sub Undertones, Fluff and Smut, I'll tag as I go, Kinky, M/M, Masturbation in Shower, Mj is not smart, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Original Character(s), Out of Character, Pining, Shibari, Stupid decisions, Top Jinjin, Trust, Writing Exercise, bad judgement, cute sex, learning to submit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-07-29 05:07:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16257278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinigamibutter/pseuds/Shinigamibutter
Summary: Jinwoo has a problem. The problem is Myungjun, or more accurately how badly he wants him.





	1. Cute Fetish

**Author's Note:**

> I read a fic recently, no I won't tell you which one, but I liked the writing not the content. So here I am. That and I always, always, need a break from my more serious writing. I stress myself out with how perfect I think it has to be. That said this is a far cry from anything perfect.

Jinwoo had a problem, of course he didn’t know he had a problem until it was too late. And now that it was too late to understand he had a problem, that problem was staring him in the face. Quite literally in fact. As his problem just happened to be Myungjun, not Mj because Mj was for the stage and a more for cameras only persona. Myungjun was the off cameras, just as funny as Mj, cuter than a puppy, sunshine, happy virus that kept Astro going when the going was tough. Granted Myungjun, himself, wasn’t the problem, Jinwoo _knew_ that.

At least he liked to tell himself he knew that, but today it wasn’t exactly working. Because, it was indeed, Myungjun who decided to strut around the dorm in nothing but shorty-short style boxers and an oversized hoodie. Which meant he was looking _fucking_ adorable. And that was a problem as Jinwoo had only recently discovered, or more accurately recently _admitted_ , to himself that he has a weakness for the cute and sexy type. Which was ultimately much rarer than one or the other by themselves.

The conundrum was that Myungjun definitely fell under that category. And after admitting his preference to himself he’d realized all too alarmingly that his feelings for Myungjun were shifting. Well, no he knew that wasn’t quite true either as he stared at his elder. Taking in what was clearly on display while the other male curled himself onto the couch with a book. Jinwoo knew his feelings for Myungjun had always been a little more intense than for the other members, though he’d never found them sexual before.

Jinwoo couldn’t help smiling to himself as he thought about how he wasn’t being honest with himself yet again. He knew, had known since becoming an idol trainee that given the right man he’d swing that way. But only for that _one man_ , no more and no less. It had always been Myungjun. At first he’d fooled himself into thinking he felt more strongly towards the slightly taller male because he was the eldest in the group, and would need more affection to feel like part of the team. The excuse hadn’t lasted.

Excuses of course are a dime a dozen and the next excuse he found himself using was definitely easy to come up with. That being that since he and Myungjun were closer in age he’d of course feel closer, and more strongly towards him. Which to a point was true, thus it worked so long. Right up until he’d had his first not quite platonic thought about the eldest member. Then there was another excuse, flimsy and a representation of his actual feelings, that Myungjun needed more love because he was cute.

That of course, had been when everything had gone downhill with him being unable to ignore or truly acknowledge how adorable he found the taller male. Which slid into no longer being able to deny what he was feeling. Since his heart swelled with so much love it _hurt_ whenever he looked at Myungjun and his cuteness. He was forced to acknowledge his heart had always swollen up with love and emotion ever since he’d gotten to know the older male better. And then there had been no denying what he truly felt after that.

Forcing himself to acknowledge his feelings had of course taken him much further than he’d anticipated. Though he knew he should have been prepared for that, expecting it even. He hadn't, didn’t, and now it had left him sitting across the living room in a chair staring at Myungjun. Taking in every page turn, lick of the lips, and the infrequent, but tempting, glimpses of more thigh when the taller shifted to sit more comfortably with his book. He couldn’t help thinking it just wasn’t fair.

It wasn’t fair that Myungjun was just sitting there, hair unkempt, his face a bit shiny from oils, with large bags under his eyes and still looking like a gift from god. A delectable, scrumptious gift that Jinwoo wouldn’t mind partaking in if Myungjun were willing. He doubted it. After all Myungjun _is_ the manly type despite how _fucking_ adorable he constantly looked. Just like now. Still even knowing that the taller male probably wouldn’t want to do anything he couldn’t help thinking about it.

There wasn’t much he didn’t want to do to Myungjun in the moment. Which caused him to shift as his thoughts drifted to the exact actions he’d like to take. Starting with pulling Myungjun up from the couch and taking him back to his bedroom where he’d toss him on the bed. Just so he could look down at the other’s startled face and crumpled hoodie, that undoubtedly would show even more thigh. Then he’d lean down and kiss the other for all he was worth, until he was begging for more.

At that point the hoodie would have to go, courtesy of his fingers pushing it up while exploring the smooth skin underneath. The idea of gazing down at the lithe body of his elder had him shifting in the chair again, noticing Myungjun shift at the same time. He licked his lips at the amount of thigh that flashed before it was gone, under the hoodie. What he wouldn’t give to push it up even further himself and then kiss Myungjun through his boxers.

“You’re staring.” Myungjun could tell that his voice had startled Jinwoo, it was fairly obvious from the way he jumped slightly. It made him want to sigh. This was just one of the many times he’d caught the leader staring at him recently, recently being in the last few months. It was always while they were home and he was just lounging around in his casual clothing. And if he were being honest he couldn’t make heads or tails of the situation. Neither could the other members when he asked their advice.

“Uh..sorry.” Myungjun didn’t need to hear the apology to know that it wasn’t all that sincere, it never was when it came to this. So he sighed again and tried to ignore the feeling as he turned another page. Emphasis on tried. Jinwoo had been staring at him for the last ten minutes off and on, now that he’d been called out on it it seemed that he was going to continue much to Myungjun’s annoyance. He was just trying to enjoy his book what was Jinwoo’s problem?

Jinwoo had looked away for maybe a second before his eyes had been drawn back to Myungjun, whose cheeks were a bit red with annoyance. He told himself that it wasn’t attractive and it was a bad thing, his body wasn’t buying it. And it hadn’t been until Myungjun had said something that he’d realized his thoughts had carried his body along with them. Leaving him sitting in the living room with Myungjun half hard and with no escape. Even the thought of Myungjun seeing him like this wasn’t enough to detour his body.

Instead the idea of Myungjun looking at how hard he was only made him harder. The image of the taller male on his knees before him, the hoodie sleeves covering half his palms while what was  visible of his hands resided on his cock, came to mind. Followed of course by the cute pout of Myungjun begging to suck it. It was at that point in the image that reality shifted and Myungjun rose from the couch setting his book down angrily. Jinwoo swallowed hard, the angry look was cute. Cuter than it should have been and had his pants feeling almost painfully tight.

“You’re still staring Jinwoo.” Myungjun was miraculously able to keep his voice level, annoyed but not boiling over in the anger that had built up at wondering what the fuck was going on. “Why are you staring?” He raised his eyebrow at the way that Jinwoo paused, shifting oddly in the chair, in a way that Myungjun recognized but didn’t want to believe. He repeated himself grabbing the parts of his sleeves that hung into his open palms. He wasn’t going to fist up if he didn’t have to. But this was getting ridiculous.

“I…” Jinwoo swallowed and shifted again, trying not to think about the way Myungjun’s eyes followed the movement. It wasn’t going to change anything about him being hard, but it certainly wouldn’t do for Myungjun to truly notice his erection. After all he wasn’t about to tell the elder that it was his fault entirely that he had one in the first place. No matter how tempting it was. His body’s reactions were his body’s fault not Myungjun’s. Despite how easy and tempting blame placing was he wasn’t about to stoop to that level.

Yet he was sure he looked like a fish with his mouth flapping open as he tried to come to an acceptable answer. Instead “You look cute,” stumbled out of his mouth with a breathy quality he’d been trying to forego and failed. The flustered look it earned him along with the way Myungjun’s hands were clenched on his oversized sleeves made the scene cuter. And Jinwoo knew he was going to need release soon from the way his cock twitched at pouting angry cheeks that followed his words.

Myungjun felt flustered that hadn’t been the answer he’d expected, but he stood his ground. Puffing his cheeks out in anger and a bit of lecture mode, minus the arm stance. He was always cute according to Jinwoo, that wasn’t an excuse for staring. It wasn't an excuse for Jinwoo's increasingly odd interest in him, but he was trying to focus one problem at a time. The current one being called cute when he was the manliest of the group, well if you asked him and not Jinwoo or Minhyuk. “That doesn't explain your staring.”

Watching Jinwoo be the one trying to clamber for an answer was something that Myungjun had always found just a little bit amusing. Well, really any of Astro that wasn’t him as it seemed it was always him. This time though it wasn’t enjoyable, something was different and it was hard for Myungjun to put his finger on it as he saw the rising panic in Jinwoo’s eyes. As if this one answer was more important than any he’d given in the last few months. It wasn’t until the younger shifted again that Myungjun realized what was going on, that he saw what was going on.

The real problem was that Myungjun wasn’t sure how he felt about it. His body’s reaction was instantaneous enough a dry mouth, an uncomfortable shift, then followed by reeling thoughts of denial. Spiraling him under and this time leaving him staring at what he’d seen. Jinwoo was hard, straining against the lounge pants he was wearing and struggling to hide it. Though Myungjun, and anyone else with common sense, knew there was no hiding it with how obvious the erection was. Which he supposed, for this time, explained why Jinwoo was staring.

Myungjun sighed after a few more seconds of waiting before turning away and waving a dismissive hand at Jinwoo behind his back. “Nevermind.” He didn’t need to hear it put to words. Somehow he was certain that if Jinwoo said it he’d feel more disappointed than he felt now. He wasn’t even sure why he was _disappointed_ to begin with, it wasn’t like he wanted anything to do with Jinwoo’s erection. Either way he wasn’t about to embarrass the younger by making him try to hide it anymore. Erections just happened sometimes and that was okay.

Jinwoo wasn’t sure how to feel when Myungjun dismissed both him and the question he hadn’t answered. He was certain that the elder hadn’t read the situation right, likely thinking he was staring at him for an opening for escape rather than as the cause of the erection. He’d have thought the same thing in Myungjun’s shoes. Unfortunately where that logic was normally quite correct, it wasn’t this time and Jinwoo felt _guilty_ about it. Granted not guilty enough to look away when Myungjun bent all the way down to grab his book from the couch, which had tried to eat it.

He swallowed hard staring at the reveal of short boxers and a perfect ass. Shapely, meaty, and big enough to sink his teeth in to and just under it he could make out the outline of the elder’s ballsack. Not something he’d ever thought he’d want to see if he were being honest with himself. But things had changed and he found himself biting on his knuckles to keep from moaning at the sight. He knew he was getting away with no more questions he didn’t want to, shouldn’t, answer and he shouldn’t draw the attention back to them. Still it was hard to look away.

In the end it was a task he wasn’t able to accomplish until the elder had straightened out, the hoodie hiding the perfection underneath once more, and made to leave. Which had him looking away from Myungjun and down at the problem his presence had left him with. Well that and guilt, lots and lots of guilt. There wasn’t anything to do about it though at least not without being really honest and taking a whole bunch of risks, risks he wasn’t sure would pay off. Which meant a shower was in order instead.

Jinwoo sighed to himself looking at the dorm’s door at least the other members weren’t home right now, Sanha and Minhyuk were in school while Eunwoo and Moonbin were both away filming. Even so it took him another two minutes to actually get up, waiting until he’d heard Myungjun’s bedroom door click behind him. And not for the first time he was thankful he didn’t end up sharing a room with the elder male. If he had things would be a lot more awkward than supposed random erections.

Trying to clear his thoughts had lasted him roughly long enough to get his clothes off and under the water, which felt amazing on his back. By comparison though it paled to the feeling of his hand around his shaft, firm but relaxed as he took the first stroke. His mind’s theater filling with the image of Myungjun bent over the couch, his perfect ass at just about the right height with his legs spread apart. He was able to bite back the first groan of appreciation but the second ripped through his lungs echoing around the small space.

He didn’t stop. There wasn’t anyone around who could hear him anyway, he pulled on his own flesh, the head red and angry. He could feel his cock twitching in his hand as the image in his mind shifted to Myungjun’s bare ass and what he knew was his sizable cock hanging between his legs. His brain providing him what he imagined the elder sounded like when he moaned his name and begged for him. The imagined sound and image drawing a gasp from his lips as he leaned against the shower wall, pleasure making his knees weak.

Thumbing the crown of his cock Jinwoo tried to breathe evenly, to make it last. He couldn’t be sure when he’d have time to do this again so openly. It was hard though as his fist moved steadily over his shaft, precum coating his thumb. The hand not on his cock had begun teasing his balls, thinking about what it would be like to have Myungjun’s hand on them. Hell he’d settled for his hand on Myungjun’s, sucking his cock into his mouth while he stared up at him from the edge of that oversized hoodie.

Feeling his knees weaken more at the last thought Jinwoo let out a low moan picking up the speed. He knew he wasn’t going to last so he allowed himself to picture what he wanted. The image of Myungjun bending over the coach came back into focus as he imagined the other begging for him, bouncing his ass and pleading. Until he finally gave in, slamming into the lithe hips going balls deep. He let out a hiss of air as his hand squeezed harder, he just knew Myungjun would be tight.

It wasn’t but three more strokes and he was releasing into the shower drain, his body sagging fully against the shower wall. He felt empty. But he still washed up like he knew he needed to and wished the lustful thoughts would wash away with the semen. They didn’t, wouldn’t. He was stuck with them and the knowledge that his problem was getting bigger all the time. Myungjun had almost caught him. And what could he tell him? Other than the truth if he asked.

There weren’t any easy answers and he’d known that the moment he’d accepted his attraction. He was honestly surprised he’d been able to keep it to himself this long, just a little over two months. Not much had truly changed in the grand scheme of things. On camera he was still Jinjin, Myungjun was still Mj, and they were Astro. No attraction, no feelings, just coworkers, best friends, and a boy group. Off camera was the problem, off camera there were _feelings_ and _real people_ and no audience. And he was starting to feel like he was going to need to be honest.


	2. Putting it on the line

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...I suppose we're here. I honestly don't know what we're doing but as long as it's realistically plausible enough I'm gonna roll with it. No stress, no worries. If you don't like it feel free to comment. If you do like it feel free to comment.

Myungjun sighed to himself. He’d tried to go back to reading, he had. Instead he’d wandered out of the room again for a drink once he heard the shower on and now he _regretted_ it. Jinwoo hadn’t been quiet, granted he _doubted_ the younger had felt a need to be. Myungjun wished he had because he _knew_ that the shorter male hadn’t wanted him to hear what he’d been moaning. Or that he’d been moaning at all really, most likely. But he had, and he wished he hadn’t, because it explained everything.

It was now quite obvious why Jinwoo had been acting differently for the last few months. Painfully so. And if Myungjun were wearing more than a hoodie he’d have left the dorm to think about it _somewhere else_. But since he wasn’t he’d had to steele up his nerves, cross in front of the bathroom again, this time, _thankfully_ , only to the sound of running water, and return to his room. Where he locked the door and allowed himself to pretend he hadn’t heard anything. At about twenty-five seconds he gave up and fell onto his bed face first.

Jinwoo had been moaning, which was in retrospect kind of _hot_. Though thinking that at all had Myungjun mortified to levels he wasn’t even sure how to name, and it hadn’t been just the normal sex grunting that men did. Myungjun had heard the sharp intakes of breath, the breathy sighs, and a name slipping from Jinwoo’s lips as the younger imagined whatever it was he wanted. And now that he’d heard it there was no way for Myungjun to ignore that the name he’d heard had been _his own_.

Sighing Myungjun buried his head into his pillow not sure what to do with the new information. Information he wouldn’t have had if he’d just stayed in his goddamn room and read his book. But no he’d needed a drink and in getting one he’d discovered that Jinwoo was jacking off to whatever mental image of him he’d conjured up. In having that thought he had to forcefully remind himself he wasn’t curious, in the least, what the younger male had been thinking about.

What he was curious about was why now. They’d been together as trainees and as a group for several years now and it didn’t make any sense that Jinwoo would suddenly catch _feelings_ , or he supposed more accurately lust. As they’d already spent years near each other in various states of undress, decency, and conditions. And he knew, could tell, that the odd behavior had only started recently. Of course he knew the only way to get a real answer was to ask the younger male about it.

Myungjun was _not going to do that_. There was nothing that could compel him to ask any of his  groupmates why they’d been jacking off. Let alone asking Jinwoo why he’d done so with Myungjun’s name on his lips. Or why Jinwoo had gotten hard while thinking about him in the first place. It just wasn’t going to happen, no matter how curious he was. As people who lived together there were things he couldn’t ask. This was one of them. Granted it was also something Jinwoo shouldn’t be doing either, but he was certain that their leader knew that too.

With a sigh he turned over on his back hearing the bathroom door open followed by Jinwoo’s soft footfalls in the hallway. Against his will he pictured the younger male leaving in just a towel, water dripping from hair down his chest, and the _kissable_ look of wet skin. The image brought with it a twitch of life from his nether regions that had him groaning in annoyance. He told himself that it wasn’t like he was getting hard over the fact that Jinwoo had gotten hard over him. That it was strictly all the thinking about sex that had his cock coming to life.

He could almost believe it too with the way he avoided the topic. After all, it wasn’t like he currently had a girlfriend. Nor was he that interested in having one with the tight schedule they kept he barely had enough time for himself off camera most of the time. Being in a lull didn’t change the fact that when things picked up again that little free ‘me time’ he had would be going to a girlfriend if he got one. Though he had thought that the younger male had a girlfriend and that was why he was acting strange.

Of course he knew better now. The knowledge that Jinwoo had been avoiding him, staring at him, and touching him more because he was thinking of fucking him came crashing into him like a punch in the stomach. It made something in his stomach twist which in turn made his cock twitch with even more life. And the excuse he’d been telling himself crumbled with his resolve as he looked down his own body to see his cock half hard. He’d known that it was, but he thought if he looked he might be wrong. He wasn’t.

He thought about ignoring it, it would go away after all. The problem at hand however would not. And the problem wasn’t even that Jinwoo wanted to fuck him. No the problem was that the more he thought about it the more appealing it sounded. Images filling his mind of how Jinwoo would treat him, how the younger would tease him with soft small hands slipping up his thighs and under the hoodie. Tantalizing lips that would follow, pressing unbearably gentle kisses along his skin until he reached the hem of his hoodie. Myungjun jerked himself up and shook the thoughts away.

Thinking about Jinwoo like that wasn’t going to solve the problem any either. If anything it was only going to exacerbate it. Already had from the way his cock was starting to throb but that only brought another sigh to Myungjun’s lips. A feeling built up in his chest that reminded him of the disappointment he’d felt when he’d thought Jinwoo’s boner wasn’t because of him. It ached and he wondered if maybe he was the one _catching feelings_. He certainly hoped not. Especially not if Jinwoo was only catching lust for whatever reason.

Not that reasons mattered that much when idols had sex. He’d learned that the hard way when he had dated his first idol girlfriend, and found out that she really hadn’t liked much about him except his dick either. Sex wasn’t quite encouraged but it wasn’t as frowned upon among idols as it was among fans. At least not heterosexual couplings. Between homosexual couplings it was still pretty frowned upon and thus he’d hidden his newly discovered bisexuality the moment he’d discovered it.

Which in retrospect was probably for the best because no matter how broad Jin of BTS’ shoulders were he was certain he’d never see them bared. Though it was a thought that had brought him a long way in accepting his own sexuality. Of course, Jin had only been the first of the many men Myungjun had crushed on, _silently_. He’d had many after his first idol girlfriend didn’t work out. Still Jin had been the one that made him question while the others made him certain as it just kept happening.

Granted he’d still dated girls, never brave enough to approach any of the men he’d thought about privately. At least not in that regard and thankfully the crushes faded with time. Less time than Jinwoo had spent acting strangely towards him. Sighing Myungjun found himself with the same problem the younger male had had in the living room. Trying to derail his thoughts hadn’t worked and only circled him back to Jinwoo. Who, wasn’t even Myungjun’s normal type. At least not body wise.

Still he couldn’t deny how handsome Jinwoo actually was, without makeup and before he put on garishly loud colors that blinded everyone in a ten foot radius. Well even then Jinwoo was attractive, just hard to look at. And above all Myungjun knew he would be _gentle_. He trusted him and in a lot of ways he loved him. They’d known each other for years, long enough to be comfortable and he couldn’t find any thoughts beyond that as he cock ached. Throbbing at the small thought in the back of his mind.

The thought that if he went to Jinwoo, now, he would probably help him. And then he was lost to the idea as well as the blood pumping wildly in his veins, flowing steadily downwards feeding the pull. Before he could really stop himself he was already up at the door unlocking it, no other thoughts in his head besides Jinwoo. Well Jinwoo, and what he could do to him. The images starting right back up with soft hands on his ass and probing fingers begging him to submit. A _fantasy_ he’d never trusted anyone enough to tell. He wondered if he could tell Jinwoo.

Myungjun knew the knock on the door had startled the younger male, after all he’d been out of the shower maybe a whole ten minutes. Big brown eyes looking at him helplessly through the crack that appeared when it was opened. His hair still wet and much darker than the dye job of chestnut actually was. Swallowing thickly Myungjun realized he hadn’t thought about what to say at this point. It wasn’t like Jinwoo knew he’d been caught, or even suspected he’d been caught really. And how was he supposed to _tell him_? His cock didn’t care, twitching at the way water glistened on tan skin in the new lighting.

“Hey..what’s up?” Jinwoo knew his voice was shaking, well maybe not shaking but it certainly would haven’t passed for solid. How could it with the object of his desires seeking him out? For what he wasn’t sure, but there was a look in Myungjun’s dark eyes that looked almost hungry. And even though he’d just gotten himself off in the shower it was stirring up all kinds of feelings. Almost the same amount as the way Myungjun’s hair, now a reddish brown, caught in the light. It was an attractive color on him.

They’d recently swapped hair colors again. He’d taken on the chestnut brown that Myungjun had for their comeback while Myungjun had taken the dark auburn he’d had. This was the second time they’d done so. But Jinwoo wasn’t going to complain if Myungjun looked that good in all the previous hair colors he’d ever had. He wouldn’t mind seeing them. Jinwoo tried to keep his eyes and mind trained on Myungjun’s hair as a few seconds ticked by awkwardly.

All the while Myungjun played with the hem of his hoodie, twisting slightly every which way that told of discomfort. Still Jinwoo refused to look down, knowing that the cuteness paired with hungry eyes would only do him in again. And he didn’t need another boner to make things more awkward after the living room experience. And he wouldn’t be able to explain this one any better than he had the first. He could feel it stirring anyway as the taller bit his lip, chewing it nervously. It was too _fucking_ adorable.

“I, we have a problem.” Myungjun finally said releasing his lip, he noticed the way Jinwoo’s eyes were drawn towards it. Which made his stomach tighten further. He commended himself for getting out at least some of his impromptu speech without stuttering but he knew it wouldn’t last very long as he found the words pouring from his mouth. “I-I heard you,” He felt the flush overtake his cheeks thinking of the way the shorter male moaned for him. “i-in the shower.”

If Myungjun thought his cheeks were red they were nothing compared to what Jinwoo’s were before they completed drained of color. Likely thinking the worst. In his shoes Myungjun was sure he’d feel the same way. So he rushed his words but not their meaning. “I heard you say my name and now,” He pushed the door open with his body, showcasing the real problem he had. “I’m _like this_.” He swallowed watching big brown eyes drift lower, slowly as if a _monster_ were waiting for them. He supposed there was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be more fetishes in this...After I finish setting us up for them and do my own research. Ah and the reason I chose Jin...I'm using my own bias list. Because I can.


	3. Help me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lord knows I suck at writing chapter titles. Either way hope you enjoy this. I'm testing my skills so feedback appreciated. 
> 
> There will probably, in the future be dom/sub dynamics? Play? I don't know I never write this stuff. And it's not anything aggressively so either. But it will be there, thus it's tagged. Also some other things as we all know I tag in advance so you can run screaming before you're invested

Jinwoo was certain he had to be dreaming, there was no way he was in _reality_. Reality wouldn’t so kindly hand him what he’d been lusting after for months now. Not like this. Not wrapped up in an oversized hoodie right outside his bedroom door. There was _no way_ Myungjun was possibly insinuating that he had gotten a boner over Jinwoo’s moaning in the shower. But there it was, standing at attention, straining against the material that held it captive. He resisted the urge to lick his lips drawing his eyes slowly back upwards.

Fully suspecting that the taller male’s eyes would be devoid of hunger and want, he found his breath catching when they weren’t. Instead if anything the hunger in those dark, nearly black eyes was tantamount to the hunger growling within him. He scanned his elder one more time just to be sure his eyes weren’t deceiving him. They weren’t, but he wasn’t sure how well he’d able to convey the questions that came to mind. Instead he swallowed dryly, unsure what to do or what Myungjun wanted from him. So he waited.

It was an awkward minute before Myungjun spoke, licking his lips as he stared into Jinwoo’s eyes. His voice low and heady as the words left his lips. “Won’t you help me?” Jinwoo knew this couldn’t possibly be real even as all his blood shot down his body and gathered in his cock. He had to be dreaming. There was _no way_ Myungjun, manly, cute, and _definitely not interested_ Myungjun was asking what he was asking. Still he swallowed dryly again and opened his door further, inviting him in. It earned him a grateful smile and he wondered if this was a good idea. Even if he were dreaming, but dreaming or not he couldn’t say no.

Once he entered the room Myungjun felt the awkwardness of the situation hit him full force. He wasn’t sure what to do so he just stood there. His eyes were glued to Jinwoo’s bed, unmade and a bit messy with the blankets strewn about. It wasn’t an image he could dwell on long when he heard the door click, and the lock turned. His cock twitched at what that meant for him. Licking his lips he tried to calm his heart beat, it certainly wasn’t his first time after all. Still he found himself unable to turn around and face the younger male.

In the end he didn't have to as Jinwoo enveloped him in his arms, a hard cock pressing against his left ass cheek. The breathing in his ear was borderline panting, and they were only pressed together. The thought of how intense this would actually be made his throat dry. But the words he would have spoken, a simple ‘what now’ were swallowed dryly when he heard the soft, almost inaudible whisper in his ear. “If I'm dreaming don't wake me.” Jinwoo’s voice was rough, and controlled unlike the action he took swinging Myungjun around in his arms.

The protest of the sudden, and not quite gentle action, was caught in his mouth by a skilled tongue. Chapped lips centering around his own, as that same tongue teased around his mouth. And at this point Myungjun could forget he was taller as his knees weakened. It had been a long time since he'd been kissed so desperately. Or so forcefully as the younger ran a steady but firm hand along his jaw, encouraging him to return the kiss. The other hand was on his back pulling him closer. All he could do was hold onto Jinwoo to remain standing.

Just as suddenly as it had started the kiss was over, Jinwoo’s lips moving on down his jaw to his neck while the hand there pushed his face aside for better access. The throaty moan that tore from his mouth was almost unrecognizable even to his own ears. Myungjun felt a little weak as he felt strong legs walking him backwards towards the bed. His fingers caught on tanned shoulders, fearing he’d fall while he did as the legs wanted, his brain only providing soft whimpers from his lips.

Jinwoo knew he was being a little fast, a little pushy, and a lot forward as he stopped Myungjun just at the edge of the bed. But he couldn’t think past the fog in his brain and the hardness of his cock, or the one pressed up against his thigh. The thoughts he had echoing those he’d had earlier as he looked down at Myungjun. Who was bent just enough to have the backs of his knees against the bed. Still he knew he needed to make sure, to know that even after a taste Myungjun still wanted this. “Are you sure?”

Myungjun knew what Jinwoo was asking, even after the moaning and whimpering he wanted to make sure. And at that question something in Myungjun let go, and he knew he’d give Jinwoo everything he’d been holding back and do whatever he wanted. So long as he’d fuck him until he couldn’t cum anymore. “Please,” Myungjun swallowed around his pulse, hand coming up to Jinwoo’s face pulling him in for a chaste kiss. “Please take me.” His voice quivered and he felt a twitch from Jinwoo’s cock that had his own reacting in the same manner.

Jinwoo nodded pushing Myungjun back onto the bed with his lips and his hands on the taller’s wrists, leaning over him. The kiss was deep, mostly tongue before he pulled back with a request. “Keep still ok?” He looked into dark hungry eyes until the elder nodded his consent. “Tell me if you want me to stop.” He added waiting for another confirmation, it was another nod and a hard swallow. He leaned down to lick the bobbing Adam's apple, his hands still pressing wrists into the mattress.

It took him a moment to get up the courage, having never been with another man before. He had reason to question if Myungjun had, but it didn’t matter. He was willing to work hard enough that Myungjun would forget he’d ever been with anyone else. Still the flush on his cheeks was hot when he pulled away staring into dark hungry eyes before he lowered himself. Myungjun wanted to follow lifting his wrists when Jinwoo lifted his hands. He pushed him back with one hand, happy when the elder stopped but stayed up enough to watch him.

Having Myungjun’s eyes on him made him more nervous but Jinwoo kept his eyes on the prize as he moved slowly. He licked his lips when he reached Myungjun’s cock, it was still straining under the layer of his hoodie and against his boxers. Timidly he moved the hoodie aside, his fingers grazing over the thighs he’d been dreaming about as he pushed it up. He had known Myungjun was bigger than average, he’d learned that in sharing a dorm. It was a little daunting to think about now as he pressed his lips to the tip through the smooth fabric of boxers.

The moan that earned him sent more blood searing into his cock, demanding his attention to it. Ignoring it he began kissing Myungjun through his boxers just like he’d thought about. His tongue circling the tip while his lips worked around the shaft. In much the same manner he’d treated the elder’s adam’s apple. It was a bit different with the taste of precum and spandex, not that enjoyable. But the way Myungjun threw his head back and bunched his hands in sheets made the taste worth it.

Slipping his hands under the hoodie, slowly sliding it further up Jinwoo took in the sight of Myungjun’s, not quite flat, stomach. He’d been working out but it was only doing enough to keep him from bloating, for some reason Jinwoo found he didn’t mind. His eyes were drawn instead to the ones staring down at him and swollen lips. Or more accurately the _tongue_ gliding over them. It only made him work harder on the cock against his own lips, sucking the skin through the boxers, his tongue still drawing patterns over it.

“JIN-woo,” Myungjun found himself pleading, as he licked his lips. He was enjoying this but he needed, he wanted more. But he’d promised to stay still so he didn’t dare buck his hips or prevent the younger from looking at his chest. The fingers that ghosted over this stomach tickled, but they also made his cock twitch when sensitive spots were found. Drawing more moans from him as he tried to focus on what Jinwoo was doing. A difficult task. “Please.” He kept repeating but he wasn’t sure what he wanted. Though he was pretty sure it was Jinwoo’s lips in more places.

Jinwoo smirked against Myungjun’s cock as he told him to beg more, his fingers easing under the waistband of his boxers the more pleas he heard. He knew the other was close which meant he needed to prepare him now. Still he felt a little dizzy at the idea that he would actually be fucking his best friend, group mate, and another male. Yet he didn’t want to stop as he pulled the boxers off completely, licking his lips as he stared at the now fully revealed length. Seven inches, he swallowed thickly it was just a bit shorter than his own.

Myungjun winced when Jinwoo pulled away, even as he shushed him and motioned him to stay still. He did as he was told, his body hot and aching for what would come next and they’d barely done much of anything. Well he knew that wasn’t true from the way his heart was pounding in his ears and how wet his boxers had been. He could feel how close he was to cumming even with his boxers on. He knew he’d been right about intense as he stared up at Jinwoo from his elbows. The younger was licking his lips and staring back at him, making his cock twitch with _need_.

Jinwoo took a moment to admire Myungjun laying on the bed. He was tilted up on his elbows with messy hair from throwing it back against the bed, his eyes blown out from arousal. His hands were still covered by the longs sleeves of his hoodie that was bunched up revealing his stomach. And to top it off there was his erect cock, leaking precum. Jinwoo felt his heart swell and his cock twitch at how cute the elder looked and how _fuckable_. He didn’t want to wait, but he knew he needed to as he pulled a thing of lube from his secret stash.

Reading about and doing were separate things entirely he came to realize as he set about the task of prepping Myungjun. Who was at least helpful and understanding as he nervously worked in the first finger, telling the elder to relax as he ran his tongue over his cock. The muscles were tighter than he was used to and the resistance a little stronger but he was up to the task. Actually Jinwoo knew he would master the task if it meant making Myungjun moan even more than he had earlier. But he still took it slowly, stretching, lubing, and making sure he didn’t hurt the elder.

Myungjun could feel the patience and dedication rolling off Jinwoo as he worked, even though it was a bit slow and he could feel his cock deflating at the pain. It wasn’t difficult to stay hard, not like the first time he’d done this when his partner had rushed through it thinking about them self. Just watching Jinwoo take care of him, his lips lingering over his thighs and cock as he worked his fingers steadily inward and stretched them, was hot all on its own. The care and concern in his eyes as he sucked on his cock to keep it up was enough to get the job done. Not that he was going to say that.

Suddenly there it was, that spot that had him nearly screaming out Jinwoo’s name when it was found. And Myungjun found his fingers bunching up in the sheets again, cock hardening out of physical pleasure at the touch. He could see Jinwoo’s smirk pressed into his thigh just as well as he could feel it. He didn’t even try to stop himself from rocking back into the feeling, his head hitting the bed as he thought about how it would feel to have Jinwoo’s full length pressing into that spot.

Just as suddenly as he’d started to finger fuck him Jinwoo had stopped and Myungjun couldn’t help letting out a whine. And trying to pull the younger closer when he leaned over and stared down at him again. Jinwoo had shook his head while stroking himself with lube telling Myungjun to stay still. He looked so _fucking hot_ that Myungjun didn’t argue waiting, because he wanted this. He wanted Jinwoo inside him. He wasn’t his normal type, with broad shoulders and so much taller than himself. But he still. He squirmed at the care that was shown him even as Jinwoo lined his cock up with his entrance.

It didn’t hurt much at all. Instead it felt amazing as Jinwoo pushed into him and Myungjun felt himself come undone right there. His hips being pressed apart and his lips locking onto Jinwoo’s already swollen ones. Their hips moving together in a seesaw motion of one in and one out in rhythm into the bed. He saw colors behind his eyes as the shorter male angled himself to hit the sweet spot he’d found, thrusting into it over and over. Before he knew it Myungjun was screaming.

Jinwoo grunted as blunt fingers dug into his back and sides, trying to find some form of reality to hold on to he was sure. At least he was pretty sure from the way Myungjun was nearly screaming yes, fuck, and god right there every few thrusts. It made him harder as it caused the walls of Myungjun’s ass to tighten in ecstasy, there were tears in the taller's eyes as he begged him to make it last. Jinwoo wanted to accommodate as he slowed down a touch, raining kisses over the tops of his elder’s collar bones, sucking on random spots there.

“Jinwoo, Jinwoo,” Myungjun found himself crying as his ass was pounded into, his cock caught between them but neglected as he strove to stave off his orgasm. He wanted it to be denied, he wanted to keep going, as he felt the shorter’s balls slamming into his ass. Then he felt fingers curling around his nipples, pinching, pulling, and twisting in a way that sent blood between his legs. “Please, please” The words fell from his lips but again he wasn’t sure what he wanted as he followed the rhythm Jinwoo set.

“Tell me what you want Myungjun.” Jinwoo breathed into an ear, running his lips along it reveling in the way it made the taller male take a sharp intake of breath. “I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me.” He continued while pinching a nipple between his fingers. There were still many, many things he wanted to do to Myungjun, but already he could feel how close the other was. Precum was covering his stomach, and sliding up Myungjun’s chest to stain his hoodie. A sight Jinwoo had partook in more than once.

Myungjun swallowed hard on his next moan thinking about what he wanted. He wanted a good deal many things from Jinwoo namely being his hands on his cock. But his voice stopped in concern over the more unusual things he truly wanted, that he wasn’t sure he could say. They were embarrassing. They were a lot to ask for. Still he leaned up, pressing his lips to Jinwoo’s ear, enjoying how sensitive they were to his lips. He took a breath and let go. “I want you to control me. Take care of me.”

Jinwoo stopped, his eyes going wide. There was no way that _Myungjun_ , bossy, needy, and sometimes a pain in his ass Myungjun, had just said that. His lack of action was met with whining and grabby hands as he placed his hands to either side of the elder’s head and just stared. His cock was still buried balls deep twitched at the sight beneath him. Messy hair, hungry eyes, pouty lips, and sweater paws pulling at him. But he had to make sure. “You want me to control you? To take care of you?” He repeated, the words sinking in a little further with a confirming nod.

Smiling to himself Jinwoo slowed down again, pulling out just to thrust in slower. “Like this?” He asked setting a new pace that left his own body sweating with the way the friction pressed against him. His lips descended to Myungjun’s throat, sucking on it softly. He let up one of his hands to roam over what he’d revealed of the taller’s chest. Myungjun practically purred under him, his body arching into the touches. He thought he understood now what Myungjun wanted, to let go and trust that Jinwoo would see to his needs.

He was more than up to the task, if asked in the moment he’d probably say he was born for the task. But luckily Myungjun didn’t ask. Instead he just continued to lean into every touch, meeting every slow thrust, and caressing every inch he could reach with his own hands. A sudden shift from the mad but intense pace they’d started with. It wouldn’t last, they both knew as the pace shifted back into fast, quickened thrusts and low drawn out moans. But he now knew what Myungjun wanted. What he could give him, and he’d do it again if given the chance.

Myungjun swallowed back his tears at how suddenly gentle Jinwoo was, the caressing and kissing almost too much to handle. He didn’t regret telling him. Still it didn’t last long, he’d known it wouldn’t as he felt a hand on his cock. He’d tell Jinwoo about the rest later, about what he really, really wanted later. Right now all he could think about were the points where their bodies met. His breaths coming in pants and his vision tunneling down to Jinwoo as his climax climbed up his throat.

When they came it was one after another and Jinwoo rolled away panting harshly as he looked over at Myungjun. He had both their cum on his hoodie and his hair was a mess, from both Jinwoo’s hands in it and moving against the bed. But his lips were smiling, swollen and still so _kissable_. All Jinwoo could think about was doing this again. But he knew, had known the moment their lips met this wasn’t a dream. He just wasn’t sure what anything meant now that he’d carried through with it anyway. Now that they’d done that and crossed the line that wasn’t supposed to be crossed.

There wasn’t time to question as the door in the living room could be heard. A frenzy of movement and Myungjun had his boxers in his hand, hoodie hiding him as made his way to the door. Though Jinwoo knew if anyone looked too hard they’d know what happened. Well part of it at least. There was no hiding Myungjun had just gotten laid, Jinwoo though wasn’t too bad off with sweat pants and wet hair. He didn’t hear any commotion from the hallway though as he laid back on his bed and thought about what he’d done. And what he was going to do about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly didn't expect to get here so soon. But I suppose that's just how it's going down this time.


	4. Girlfriend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am stressed the fuck out. So let's throw in a plot kink ^ . ~

Myungjun hated himself as he cleaned up after having sex with Jinwoo. The realization hitting him well after the fact that it had been the stupidest idea he’d ever had before. It had also been the best sex of his life, but that didn’t make his decision to have it any less stupid. As it now put him and the leader of the group he was in into limbo. A place he’d never wanted to be which was why to experiment he’d only slept with a guy who didn’t know who he was, or that he was an idol.

He’d just thrown all that out the window to sleep with someone he cared about. And he knew he shouldn’t have. Because he wanted more, he wanted to tell Jinwoo about the things he really wanted. To let him take care of him the way he just had, well a little more on the specific side but Jinwoo had done great even without specifics. But he knew he couldn’t. After all, Jinwoo was probably only suffering from lust and there’d he gone and opened up to him in the moment. And like he’d been afraid of he had to admit he’d caught  _ feelings. _

If he’d been unsure before it was more than evident now as he thought about Jinwoo’s eventual rejection when he would ask him to fuck him again. Or if he,  _ heaven forbid, _  asked him on an actual date. It made his chest constrict at the thought. Before he knew it he was pulling out his phone texting the one person he swore he never would like this again. After all, if he were no longer single there was no way Jinwoo could reject him. He’d have no need to even think of slipping into the leader’s bed. And if he’d really been wanted there he reasoned the younger would have stopped him from leaving. 

It felt wrong, it felt stupider than sleeping with Jinwoo had as he explained what had just happened. Staring at the text it was almost unbelievable to think it had actually happened at all, and maybe he was just dreaming. But one glance down at his hoodie told a completely different story. He tore it off and tossed both it and his boxers in the laundry thinking about how he’d tell Jinwoo that he’d gotten back with his ex in the next few days. Since he was sure it would take that long for the younger to wish to talk to him again. 

The reply was instant, he knew it would be. Natalie was always down to whatever he wanted, she was a good friend before they’d dated. And had remained so. The break up had been mutual as they both knew he couldn’t be what she needed and she couldn’t be what he needed. But they had an understanding as well and had hooked up several times over the years. Usually when one of them was being emotional or having trouble moving on from someone they truly wanted. He’d told her he was done with that when he debuted. 

Still they’d kept in touch and every so often met up for lunch. All of Astro knew her as his predebut girlfriend. His ex girlfriend now of course but none of them had said anything when they met up. They didn’t react at all except the one time Minhyuk had shot him a look then looked over at Jinwoo as if there was something going on. That had been years ago but Myungjun wondered now if maybe he had been blind for years. He wondered again if this was stupid, but he had to talk to someone. He had to fix this.

Though he knew there was no way he was actually going to date Natalie again. Last he knew she was in a committed and healthy relationship, he just needed to pretend. Maybe. He felt a nagging in the back of his mind as he replied. A thought that informed him he was just running, that he didn’t know what Jinwoo thought, let alone felt. Of course he knew  _ that, _  but he couldn’t help being  _ scared _ . He’d slept with his best friend, his leader, and  coworker. And somewhere in the process realized that he had  _ feelings _ for him. That probably weren’t returned.

He reasoned at the very least it wouldn't hurt to meet up with her and talk. She could be trusted with these things at the very least. She gave good advice too and any other kinds of decisions could be made afterwards. After he took a moment to think, instead of making the hasty impulsive decision again. After all that’s how he’d ended up in Jinwoo’s bed. Throwing clothes on in a hurry he fixed his hair and went out to meet her. It was still early enough for dinner if he hurried. 

As he slipped from the dorm he saw Jinwoo talking to their manager, who must have been the one to return. He was grateful he hadn’t been home before or they would have gotten caught. Trying not to think about it anymore he headed to the location Natalie had told him to meet her at. She’d been entirely too interested in hearing what stupid thing he’d done this time. Because he wasn’t stupid enough to put the whole thing to text. Too many idols had their phones hacked in recent years for him to make that kind of mistake. 

Natalie was just as he remembered her when he entered the small restaurant. She was taller than him, pretty with straight black hair and blue eyes. Her white skin stood out amongst the many deep tans around her. As she was mixed. He smiled at her and she smiled back as he settled into his seat. It was nice catching up on old times, new times, and everything in between. He was no longer nervous about what had just happened the more he talked to her about it. Her advice mindful and honest as it always had been. By the time he left he knew what he was going to do. 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I know people are reading this I apologize for my lack luster writing. But I've always wanted to try this. So I'm doing it.


	5. Media Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A plot or a convenient reason to keep fucking. You decide

Jinwoo sighed to himself. He hadn’t slept well last night even though he’d been on cloud nine for most of the night. It had come crashing down not long after he’d laid down and realized that he still hadn’t actually talked to Myungjun. That he wasn’t even sure what he’d say to him either. Whatever he did say he knew he couldn't start it off with I've been in love with you for years. Even if it  _ technically _ was true, it wasn’t like he’d been aware of his own feelings for a majority of the time to begin with. And unfortunately morning hadn’t brought any more answers than tossing and turning had.

Figuring he’d think about it later he dug out his phone from where it had fallen in the night with his movements. And found himself in a cold sweat at the first message from their manager that sat there unread from an early eight in the morning send time. It was only a little past nine now. Deciding that was the last thing he wanted to see Jinwoo instead went straight to the group chat to see what his members were up to. As not all of them were  _ scheduleless _ like himself and Myungjun. 

The first, well last message, was a bunch of question marks from Eunwoo and Moonbin alike. Which had him scrolling up to the first message he missed. It was an article link with Myungjun’s picture front and center and a headline that had Jinwoo’s heart falling into his stomach. ‘Astro’s Mj caught with his  _ girl friend _ ?’ Was in big bold print, he noticed the space between words but Jinwoo knew better than to think that meant anything to the fans. 

It was the click baitest ad he’d seen in a long time. He looked at the source and curse. AllKpop. They weren’t above ruining someone’s career over nothing, or over things they shouldn’t be poking their noses into without facts to back them up. Granted it still stung to see Mj’s name with that kind of libel. Except in the back of his mind he had to wonder if it was indeed  _ libel, _ and he was two seconds from clicking on the link when he remembered the manager’s message. It was probably related to this. 

Sighing Jinwoo read through the other messages in the chat, they weren’t helpful as Myungjun’s reply wasn’t among them. Instead it was anger, questions, and what ifs. What ifs were what Jinwoo was afraid of. Last night had been  _ amazing, _ but he knew, had known while it was happening that might be all it was. It wasn’t like they’d talked, agreed to anything, or even really done anything more than had sex. Which he supposed in hindsight could get really awkward if it wasn’t handled soon, and  _ correctly. _ Especially if the article had a leg to stand on. He suspected it didn’t, but there was always that what if.

His heart was beating a mile a minute when he decided he ought to read the article before he went to find their manager. He would wait, and if he were lucky it wasn’t actually anything too serious. The moment the article loaded he was greeted by a picture of Myungjun and his predebut ex side by side. His heart dropped to his stomach and he tried to ignore how much it hurt to at least focus on the words. Just because Myungjun had dated her a long time ago didn’t mean anything, they were still ‘friends’. In the back of his mind he tried to stay positive.

The article itself wasn’t very informative or official sounding. Just a blurb with the basics ‘Astro’s Mj was spotted at xxx cafe with mysterious attractive woman, known to frequent idol circles’ which wasn’t even true. Natalie was, as far as Jinwoo knew a very down to earth woman who preferred to stay out of the limelight. Unless her personality had a complete change since the last time. Which he knew it could have since he hadn’t really wanted to know anything about her,  _ at all. _ Another sign about his feelings he’d missed way back when. 

In the end it didn’t matter what the article said, it was the pictures that ended it that left Jinwoo’s heart aching. There were only two, one of them at the table with Natalie leaning forward and laughing, her hand on Myungjun’s arm. Nothing much really, a friendly gesture that could be misread. But the second picture was left him holding back his tears seeing it, knowing that not long before it was taken he was with Myungjun. But in the photo Myungjun was leaning into her, in a way that it looked like he was kissing her cheek, the smile on his face open and happy. It hurt. 

He didn’t open the message from his manager for another ten minutes, in which he tried not to cry and reasoned himself into a different mindset. It wouldn’t do him any good going in and being unreasonably upset, or reasonably upset for reasons he didn’t want to talk about. It wasn’t like he could just tell the manager that he was upset because he’d finally fucked Myungjun,  _ like he’d always wanted, _ only to wake up to an article about him having a  _ ‘girl friend’. _ No that would have to remain private, and possibly never, ever be talked about again. 

Before he could open the message though he was interrupted again by the door opening, but he didn’t look up. Moonbin was still home, or should still be home if hadn’t decided to leave early. And he wasn’t in the mood to talk to him if all he’d done was forget something in the room. When Moonbin didn’t move from the door, or at all though after a very long pause Jinwoo huffed to himself and looked up. Whatever the younger wanted he wasn’t going to like the answer he was sure. But the quip died on his tongue, it wasn’t Moonbin but Myungjun standing with his back to the door, eyes glued on him as he locked the door.

“Myungjun…” Jinwoo felt the tears pricking at his eyes thinking about the article he’d just read and the serious look on the elder’s face. This was the end, he just knew it. The end to what he wasn’t sure as nothing had started, but he knew now that it couldn’t. Wouldn’t. Mentally he berated himself for thinking there really ever could be anything more than the one time. Even that had been asking too much and he’d be a fool to think otherwise. Still he wanted to hope as Myungjun looked into his eyes.

“We need to talk.” Myungjun could tell from the look on Jinwoo’s face he’d seen the article, he’d just seen it himself and he was  _ pissed. _ He knew Natalie would never set him up like that, well actually she’d called him crying about it because her boyfriend was pissed. And if he could he’d join her in the lawsuit she wanted to put together against AllKpop for defamation. It hurt her image as well since her boyfriend was an actor and she was often seen in his circle of friends for her own work now. Of course she’d also been angry for him and his budding relationship which would be sure to suffer.

He’d told her not to worry about that and he’d take care of it. But seeing the look on Jinwoo’s face, a bit broken and a lot hurt, he realized she was right. This might not be something so easily fixed. He was going to try though, but first things first he needed to wipe that look off Jinwoo’s face. Which he decided to do by crossing the room and settling down on the edge of the bed just within arm’s reach. When Jinwoo’s eyes drifted downard so did his, staring at the younger’s pajamas that were crumpled with collarbones just peeking out. 

“It’s about the article.” He finally continued when Jinwoo didn’t say anything or look back up. He could tell though he was about to ask what article from the way his shoulders moved. Beating him to the punch was easy, but it also felt like he was punching their leader from the way he flinched at his words. “The article about me and Natalie.” He held his breath afterwards hoping to get a reaction but when none came it let it out in a huff. He knew this wasn’t going to be easy but it was going to be worth it,  _ he’d make sure of it _ . 

“I’m not dating Natalie, I only went out to see her because I needed to talk to someone about what happened between us.” Myungjun said his words slowly watching them sink in but knowing that Jinwoo would still question, that anyone would still question. He sighed when the younger still didn’t look at him, but he lifted his hand running in through the chestnut hair that was disheveled from sleep. “It sounds like an excuse, but I couldn’t exactly talk to the other members about it _and_ _I certainly couldn’t ask you for advice on my feelings about you_.” 

The last statement got a reaction, a small one but at least Jinwoo was looking at him now. Myungjun continued to run his fingers through his hair noticing the way the younger reluctantly leaned into it. His brown eyes were still watery but he saw the hope in them. “If you’re not dating Natalie why were you kissing her cheek?” Jinwoo’s voice was soft and he had to lean in to hear it completely. But Myungjun could only laugh at that, which got him an angry but still hurt look.

“Jinwoo...Jinwoo…” Myungjun found himself smiling and feeling a bit surreal about everything. There was no denying the look on Jinwoo’s face was jealousy. And it made his heart swell just a little bit because it meant he might really have a hope in an actual relationship and not just fucking. The very thing he’d been afraid to ask about and had talked to Natalie about wanting. “I didn’t kiss her cheek, actually she’s in more hot water over those photos than I am.” He shook his head, he at least hoped that was true. “Her boyfriend didn’t even know who I was until the article.” 

“Boyfriend?” Jinwoo lifted an eyebrow at that finally looking into Myungjun’s face completely seeing what he knew was a smitten smile. He felt like he might explode into one as well having heard that Myungjun had  _ ‘feelings’ _ for him, even if he wasn’t sure what they were yet. They were something and he and he’d be hard pressed to say he wasn’t desperate for something after last night. Though he didn’t want to give into his hopes too early, it was becoming harder to ignore them with Myungjun’s hand in his hair.

“Yeah she’s dating some actor now. Has been for awhile. It was nice to catch up with her.” Myungjun swallowed, he knew their manager was technically waiting on them as he’d read the message from him to meet him with Jinwoo. But this was more important, this was something he’d never realized he wanted until he got it. Now that he was so close he wasn’t about to let it slip away. “But I did whisper to her when I left, thanking her for her advice. She gives wonderful advice you know.” He swallowed again his mouth going dry at what he was about to do. It was still risky, he still didn’t know Jinwoo’s true feelings after all.

“Her advice was to tell you that I like you, and I’d like to date you.” Myungjun felt his heart stop at how wide Jinwoo’s beautiful brown eyes got and the sharp intake of breath that followed. It had him holding his own breath, waiting and hoping for a favorable reply. He wasn’t sure what he would do if it wasn’t one. Or what would become of them now that they’d crossed a line they shouldn’t have. A line until yesterday he hadn’t realized he wanted to cross. But since he had he wanted to keep crossing it, and he wanted Jinwoo to cross all the other lines he’d drawn for himself as well. 

Jinwoo knew he was taking to long to answer, Myungjun’s face full of hope and well openness. It was just a shock, he’d never thought any of his desires would come true. He hadn’t really even believed yesterday could be real less than a few short hours ago. Then he’d had the article dumped on him and now Myungjun’s confession. It was a little too much, but just like yesterday he knew _dreaming or not_ he couldn’t say no. He wouldn’t say no. There was no way he could reject Myungjun after wanting him for so long. 

“I like you too.” He finally found his voice and the tears he’d been holding back fell down his cheeks as Myungjun smiled at him. Jinwoo felt there was something a little off in the way the elder smiled but he didn’t say anything as he moved forward, his hands landing on Myungjun’s shoulders. He hesitated only a second before pressing his lips to Myungjun’s full lips, the contact was brief but he pulled back before it could be deepened. The manager’s text weighing on the back of his mind as he spoke. “Let’s date.” 

Myungjun nodded and found himself mute. He hadn’t actually expected it to go so well and he knew his cheeks were pink when Jinwoo pulled back completely and started to get up. He didn’t miss the expression on his face when he looked at his phone. The younger’s words expected and prepared for when he asked if the message from their manager was why he’d come over. He had to be honest though as he looked up at Jinwoo from the bed, he was staring down at him seriously after all. 

“I came over because I wanted to fix things, to talk. I only saw the article after Natalie called me up in arms asking me if I’d like to join a lawsuit.” Myungjun noted the smirk that Jinwoo’s face twitched into at the mention of suing AllKpop. “We still need to talk,” He noticed the younger shift uneasily. “After we talk to the manager of course. There’s just some relationship things we’ll have to discuss right?” Jinwoo nodded and he stood slowly, smiling as he placed a chaste kiss on Jinwoo’s lips. “For now let’s get this over with. Our manager is the in living room.” He knew from here things would only just begin, but he was looking forward to it. 


	6. The talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is gonna include a lot of things I tagged for. Communication is really, really important guys. Even if it's hard. If you can't tell them what you want maybe you ought to reconsider how you really feel.
> 
> Okay preaching session over on with the fic!

The talk with their manager had gone on much longer than either Myungjun or Jinwoo wanted to sit through. But Myungjun felt better after it, even just a little bit knowing that the rumor would be squashed. And that the lawsuit Natalie had started was something he could join in on, because he really wanted to teach AllKpop _a lesson_. He doubted they’d learn it though, they hadn’t before. But it meant that he was already mentally drained by the time he was able to be alone enough with Jinwoo to have their talk. But he knew, above all else this talk needed to happen.

He wasn’t about to have another incident because they hadn’t taken the time to communicate with each other. An important part of being in a team was communication and that was something Astro excelled at. Myungjun knew they’d just have to do it here too in their newly forming relationship. It didn’t make it less awkward though as they came to a standstill in the room Jinwoo shared with Moonbin. The door just closed behind them and memories of what they’d done the night before fresh in their minds.

Myungjun knew better than to dwell on that as he settled himself at the edge of Jinwoo’s bed looking up at him by the door. Neither of them moved for another whole minute, an air of awkward hanging between them because neither was sure where to start. He’d known it would be like this, _it was always like this_ when one had serious things to discuss. Because opening your mouth felt like you were breaking a delicate balance that wasn’t supposed to be touched. _He knew better,_ anyone who had healthy relationships knew better. But the awkward never left, always coming back until it was broken again and put away for next time.

“So…” Jinwoo’s voice was heavy, uncertain but still solid and the way he crossed the short distance the to the bed more assured than Myungjun knew he felt. But the silence was broken and that was the first step. Next would be actually addressing what they needed to without the ‘you said you wanted to talk’ actually being spoken. It was everyone’s least favorite line in these situations right along with ‘we need to talk’ in its connotations. Still the way Jinwoo trailed off left the sentence unspoken but not unsaid in a way that was acceptable.

“I trust you.” Myungjun found himself blurting out the only thought that mattered as Jinwoo sat down next to him on the bed, facing him. His eyes were wide, as if the statement were unrelated to what they were about to talk about. They both knew in the long run it wasn’t, relationships were built on trust and communication. Myungjun wanted theirs to have both even if their beginnings had started a little shaky. “I want you to know that I trust you, and because I trust you I want to try this.” He continued slowly, his cheeks gaining color.

Jinwoo only nodded unsure what Myungjun was getting at. He knew the elder trusted him, well no he’d always _hoped_ the elder trusted him to the same degree he felt towards the taller male. They were best friends, and as groupmates there was a certain level of trust they had built up. He knew instantly that those weren’t exactly what Myungjun was talking about from the slow forming blush. There was something intimate that he’d never known about him that he was about to learn, and he was _scared to know it._

Of course he’d been dreaming of knowing everything about Myungjun, his taste, his smell, how he felt at any given moment, the whole nine yards. But now that was it was offered to him, with a willing and open face, no less, he was _scared._ Scared that maybe what he didn’t know could change things. Or that he wouldn’t be able to live up to what Myungjun needed, wanted. Not that he was against trying but he hadn’t been single for no reason. Still he swallowed back his doubts and smiled. “I trust you too Myungjun.”

He knew it was now or never in admitting his own needs if they truly were going to start dating. There would have to be boundaries and decisions to be made, especially on if they were going to tell the members about them or not. “Which is why I have to tell you that I have had feelings for you for a long time. And I don’t want to go too fast,” He reached out grabbing one of Myungjun’s hands rubbing his thumb along the back, heat gathering on his cheeks. “I want to go slowly and steadily, like we’re always telling Aroha.”

Myungjun blinked but found a smile forming on his lips. Leave it to Jinwoo to be _greasy_ about it, but he didn’t really want it any other way. He’d somehow fallen for that part of their leader through the years. He’d come to love how soft Jinwoo really was on the inside, not just the way he made him laugh and how their sense of humor lined up. “I’m okay with slow.” He squeezed Jinwoo’s hand and felt more color heating up his skin. “I like that you want to go slow, that _you mean it._ I like that you’ll be gentle with my heart.” He cleared his throat. “But I also like that you’ll be gentle with my body.”

“I haven’t ever been able to let go like I was able to with you. I always wanted to, I like it gentle. I want to be taken care of.” Myungjun knew there were tears in his eyes as he went on, it felt like a great weight was coming off his back. It felt like even with just telling Jinwoo he didn’t have to pretend anymore. He didn’t have to act like he liked all the things that were asked of him to do by his previous lovers. “I…” He trailed off his thoughts lingering on what he hadn’t said. What he truly wanted wasn’t so simple as a quick _‘I want to be taken care of’._

Jinwoo frowned, the tone of Myungjun’s voice concerned him it was as if someone had neglected his needs before. A mistake that Jinwoo would never make because he liked to take care of others, even if he wasn’t sure this time. _‘Take care of’_ could have several different meanings, but he was willing to do them all. Anything to make Myungjun happy in the way the elder made him happy. “When you say _taken care of..._ how do you mean?” He swallowed dryly at the way Myungjun’s face contorted.

“I mean…” Myungjun could feel his face twisting in the same his heart was, the pounding inside his chest intense as he thought about telling someone the truth. “I want you to baby me in a way?” He pulled back his hand rubbing it over his face before hiding behind it as he spoke. “I want you to tell me what to do, in bed at least. I want to be treated like I’m _fragile._ ” It was hard finding the right words to express himself because it wasn’t like he wanted to be a baby, or anything to do with that kink. But it wasn’t that he didn’t want that either.

“I think I get it?” Jinwoo finally said after a few seconds, a perplexed look on his face when Myungjun looked at him again. “Even if I don’t I can learn.” Suddenly he was smiling brightly and Myungjun felt his heart melting with how much love was being shown to him and how openly. Something that had been sorely lacking in his last failed relationship as the idol he’d dated didn’t think he should be the fragile one because he wasn’t _the girl._ “I guess I should tell you...I have a kink of sorts too...I mean not that yours is a kink, it’s totally fine to want to feel like someone cares about you...that they treat you like you’re their world.”

Jinwoo felt like he was rambling as he went on before sputtering out with a blush. Myungjun looked adorable right now too, with his cheeks tinged pink and his clothes loose and comfortable. There was something cuddly about him that had him reaching forward caressing his cheek, the warm skin under his fingers perfect and he had to tell him. “I have a weakness for when you look cute, even right now I want to kiss you so bad that it hurts.” Myungjun’s eyes were huge now but he ignored it and instead went on. “When you wear those oversized sweaters or hoodies all I want to do is _ravish you._ ”

“You know…” Myungjun was blushing and smiling and Jinwoo couldn’t keep from smiling too. “I think this is going to work out.” He leaned forward placing a chaste kiss on Jinwoo’s lips before pulling back looking at him seriously. “What do you think of Shibari?” He couldn’t help raising an eyebrow at how flushed the younger suddenly was. His hand caressing his cheek stopping suddenly as he truly thought about it, that or maybe Myungjun had broken him. “It’s okay if you don’t like it.” The words were soft, and followed by a startled reaction as if Jinwoo had gotten too lost in thought.

“I have to admit it’s not really my thing.” Jinwoo shrugged loosely the idea of it was interesting, but he wasn’t that into the idea that Myungjun would be tied up. Or that he would be if that was what Myungjun was referring to, he didn’t think so. “On me or you? If it’s you I am willing to try it.” He conceded a few seconds later with a sigh and personal admittance to himself that Myungjun would probably look very cute tied up and begging.

“Me. I trust you…” Myungjun trailed off as he heard a noise outside the door then Sanha’s loud screeching followed by more screeching and a loud video game playing. He’d probably been at it awhile and died. “Nevermind we can cross this bridge when we come to it.” With a sigh he found himself addressing one of the more pressing issues that they really needed to address. “What do we tell the others? Do we tell them?”

Jinwoo sighed as well this was a big question, an important question. It wasn’t like they were going to be just fucking willy nilly or anything like that. Though he did hope Myungjun knew slow didn’t mean no sex, just maybe not so emotionally roller coastery. That was a topic for another time though, as with shibari it was something they’d address as it came up. They’d hashed out the important parts, mostly. “Well we are _boyfriends_ now…” He blushed saying it outloud, it was still pretty surreal. “But I don’t think we should tell them until we’ve been boyfriends for awhile.”

It wasn’t that he thought it wouldn’t work or anything like that. But part of him wanted to save them the headache of trying to explain why they were dating now in the first place. He didn’t actually want anyone to know that he’d been won over by Myungjun’s cuteness. Or that he’d really only ever thought of Myungjun like that. Those were things he’d say in due time. Not immediately after they started dating. “I think it’s best we wait. Just to gauge how they might react, because other than Sanha’s screeching I’m not really sure.”

Myungjun nodded. He could agree with that, though he thought the members would react all right. At least when they found out about it, dating wasn’t always something they shared. Until it was serious at least. Or if it had been serious in the case of ex’s. He did feel this was serious, maybe more serious than any relationship he’d ever been in. But like Jinwoo said earlier he wanted to go slow, and slow meant taking things in pace with when they happened. At least that’s how he saw it. “Okay. Okay.” Myungjun nodded and leaned forward for another quick kiss. “I’m going to go take a nap now.”

Jinwoo nodded his own eyes drooping as the emotional exhaustion caught up to him after the day they’d had so far. And it wasn’t even over yet. “I’ll see you at dinner then.” He found himself leaning over to peck Myungjun’s cheeks, he wanted to do more. But he knew the other members were home. “Tell Sanha to keep it down.” He smiled sleepily as he settled into his bed his eyes barely staying open after the horrible tossing and turning he’d done. He heard the answer mumbled as Myungjun moved towards the door.

Everything wasn’t squared away, but Jinwoo knew that’s just how relationships were. They were built, one small moment at a time. One confession at a time. Like, was as good a place to start as any. Even if Jinwoo knew what he was feeling was _love_. He’d wait on Myungjun to feel it too, he wanted for them as a couple to take their time. To move slowly, step by step into forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was stressed today, in a lonely sort of way. So it might have showed sorry.


	7. Shibari

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay now that last chapter is out of the way we can get back to why I wrote this. Smut.

Things hadn’t been quite normal around the dorm and Jinwoo knew it. But he wasn’t in any hurry to fix it. He was pretty sure that Eunwoo and Moonbin were catching on to what was happening, though that might be because Moonbin ended up in Eunwoo’s room more lately. Usually with complaints about the level of skinship between himself and Myungjun. Not that Jinwoo was going to tell them that the reason they were cuddling so much lately was because they’d started dating.

It was much too soon. And Jinwoo knew even those cuddling sessions were _still_ a little awkward. Since as a group Astro really wasn’t that into skinship all of the time. It was one thing on camera, or when there was literally nowhere else to be but with the members, and another when they were home. Granted they still got plenty in. But four days curled up on Jinwoo’s bed watching movies with not even an _inch_ between them was pushing the norm. Myungjun didn’t seem to mind, both loving the attention and closeness.

After all, they both knew that during comebacks and busy schedule times there wouldn’t be time for this. Or much of _anything_ really, that was idol life after all. But he wasn’t about to dwell on it today. No, today he was going to go out. It was their last free day before they had to go do some photo shoots and interviews and he wasn’t about to waste it. Though he doubted that Myungjun would mind much, he’d already disappeared on the walk Jinwoo had insisted he take. It was important they have alone time as well and he knew it.

Though the walk had been an excuse. He had research to do and many a thing to learn and buy. Discreetly of course. Because he wanted Myungjun to be happy he was going to learn about Shibari, at least a little bit. As the only thing he currently knew about it was that it happened to be a pretty sexual art of rope tying. He’d taken a nosedive into rule thirty-four before and come across it. It was _pretty,_ it was time consuming, and it wasn’t really his interest. And he was nervous to try it.

Still he was willing to do it if only just once to make Myungjun happy. After all if his boyfriend was happy he’d be happy too. And then maybe he could talk the taller male into wearing the _catboy_ outfit he was really wanting to see him in. Or something else as equally cute but probably something Myungjun wouldn’t think to wear on his own. Jinwoo was willing to admit that he’d spent entirely too much time thinking about such options before ever, seeing them was even a slight possibility.

Granted Jinwoo knew no matter what they decided to do next time, be it just having sex, making love, or playing to one of their kinks, it would probably be awhile. Not just because of schedules and free time but because of the simple fact they were still awkward. _One amazing night and a few hot and heavy make out sessions did not a perfect couple make._ And they’d talked about it, in depth to be sure they were where they wanted to be. Well at least that’s how Myungjun had worded it, his cheeks red and his heart on his sleeve.

Jinwoo had to admit it was wiser, that going slow was what he wanted. He didn’t want a relationship that would come crumbling down at the slightest push, he wanted something that would _last._ Though he’d yet to find the courage to tell Myungjun that in exact words. He knew it was a bit too soon for that just like it was a bit too soon for them to be telling the members they were dating. Not that it really showed other than the extra cuddling they’d been doing. It wasn’t until then they’d been getting weird looks after all, and they’d been like they were before otherwise.

Well _not exactly_ like they were, he reminded himself as he left the dorm. A list of the things he’d need in his head. He’d always been soft with Myungjun since even before debut, and it hadn’t changed afterwards. But other things had with the slow realization that it wasn’t just a soft spot he was cultivating for the eldest member. Still the outings they’d gone out on before could be considered dates, a thought he’d had cross his mind more than once before when they went out. Of course he wasn’t _delusional_ enough to give the thoughts credence.

Now things were _different,_ sort of. Not in how they acted, minus the lingering touches, stolen glances, and the desire to mutually make out that wasn’t there before. Jinwoo sighed to himself at the thought that the only real difference was the level of skinship desired. Dwelling on the thought of human interactions was infinitely safer than the alternative. Which was thinking about the _type_ of store he’d just walked into and what he was there to buy. So he instead kept his head down thinking about the human condition trying not to notice anyone or be noticed.

The book section was helpful, with several different books set out. A beginner’s guide was all he wanted. Anything else he might need could come later. He hoped anyway as his cheeks burned red even looking at the cover that read in deep reds ‘Shibari for the beginner’ in bold print. He could feel the flush all the way to his toes as he stared at it. The image on it _wasn’t even that bad,_ an empty knot formation that admittedly looked very pretty. But _he knew_ that wasn’t what was inside.

Getting into the checkout lane was even more awkward and Jinwoo found himself repeating the mantra of ‘I’m an _adult,_  and adults buy adult things’ in his head. It wasn’t like it was his first _adult_ purchase, far from it really, but it was his first of this kind. His kinks easily afforded to without having to buy or research anything. Or if it did require such things the woman of the times already had them as he did tend to prefer older partners. Just a little bit. He smiled to himself thinking that at least in that regard Myungjun was his _normal_ type.

He knew deep down though that there was nothing normal about Myungjun. From the way his smile looked like sunshine on a cloudy day, to his honey dipped voice, and to the hyper activity of someone at least three years younger than them both, Myungjun was special. That though was something Jinwoo had known all along, and the only thought that allowed him to make it through the checkout line without chickening out. If Myungjun was willing to work with his kink, he should be willing to try the elder’s.

Those thoughts got him all the way back to the dorm. Which felt suddenly more like a battleground of privacy versus curious eyes. Though he knew the members wouldn’t judge if he showed them, he knew they would instantly question his relationship status though. A question he most certainly didn’t want to answer, yet anyway. Luckily he was able to slip in as Myungjun returned just seconds after him, the raised eyebrow at the black bag disregarded with a ‘I’ll tell you later’ look. And then it was to the safety of his own room and a locked door.

Where he spent the rest of the day trying not to think about Myungjun’s thighs and how much he’d like to bite them in the shorts the elder had been wearing. Instead focusing solely on the knots he’d have to learn and practice to actually do this for his boyfriend. And, _he realized,_ _for himself_ as he pictured Myungjun tied up in some of the positions shown, cock hard, eyes hungry, and completely at Jinwoo’s mercy. It was a nice mental image, not quite as good as actually seeing Myungjun at dinner, sitting right across from him. _Eyes sparkling, lips pouty, and with his feet teasing along Jinwoo’s thigh under the table._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said smut...but as any one who knows a thing or two knows if you're trying something new you don't forget to do your research. Or you could end up hurting yourself or your partner. OK? 
> 
> Why am I always putting these life lesson things...if you want me to stop you can tell me to.


	8. A moment in time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Life is stressful why can't I just be paid to write??? I mean I like doing it and I think I do it well. But I've got to adult instead.  
> 

Cuddling was easily becoming one of Jinwoo's favorite pastimes, not that he hadn’t always enjoyed it. But it hadn’t always been like this.  _ This  _ being the comfortable way Myungjun was leaned up against him, a book propped up in his hands while his back was pressed against Jinwoo’s side. Though he couldn’t tell if the other was actually reading or glancing at the drama that was playing. Jinwoo had stopped watching it a few minutes ago to instead stare down at Myungjun, whose head was resting on his shoulder.

It was still so hard for Jinwoo to believe this was really happening, despite all the extra cuddling they’d been doing lately. Before it had been different, he’d had to be  _ cautious _ about how he cuddled Myungjun, where they cuddled, and when. Now he could do it whenever he pleased, well mostly. There were still limits, there would always be limits as long as they remained idols. But this was enough. It was enough to be able to have his arm wrapped around Myungjun’s waist, fingers playing along the hem of his shirt, and the elder quietly enjoying the attention. 

Myungjun sighed contentedly to himself as he felt Jinwoo’s lips against his forehead. He’d been comfortably reading before but he’d noticed a few minutes ago when his boyfriend had stopped paying attention to the drama. As he’d been able to feel the soft look focused in his direction. He just wasn’t sure what he wanted to do about it. It was infinitely more distracting than the low volume the drama had been set to. The fingers having moved from his shirt, were now playing with the string on his lounge shorts and were even more distracting.

Still he was enjoying it. Though Myungjun didn’t want Jinwoo to know that, at least not yet. So to tease him he set his book down with a huff, making a show of putting his bookmark in just as huffily. Before turning his eyes up to glare at his boyfriend, the heated look that met his made him swallow thickly. He knew  _ that look, _ he’d been dreaming of  _ that look. _ Ever since the first time, ever since he’d realize what it meant. They hadn’t acted upon  _ that look _ since then, he wasn’t sure it was wise to act on it now. There were schedules coming up. 

It took more effort than he thought it would to make himself sound angry when he finally spoke with more than his eyes. “I’m  _ trying _ to read.” He pointed at the book he’d set on top of himself, he wondered how long it could stay in the position he’d set it, right over his crotch. His cock was already feeling a bit of life and all Jinwoo had done was stroke down his thigh just slightly in response to his glare. He tried to look huffier, as if he were actually upset, but he wasn’t sure the younger was buying it anymore. 

Planting another kiss on Myungjun’s forehead Jinwoo smiled softly, his fingers playing along a bare thigh, teasing. He couldn’t help himself he knew that his boyfriend wasn’t truly upset, but he looked so cute riled up that even if he were Jinwoo wasn’t sure he could stop himself. Wasn’t sure that the elder really even wanted him to stop. “Reading? It looked to me like you were about to doze off.” He teased slipping a finger under the shorts watching the instant reaction, a soft gasp and short whine.

The answer was a pouty ‘I wasn’t’, but that Jinwoo knew to be genuine. He held back his chuckle at Myungjun’s voice, he didn’t need to see his face to see the way his lips were just slightly downcast in the pout. He wanted to see it though, he wanted to see all of the expressions he could get out of his boyfriend. Be it the pouty ones, the  _ begging _ ones, or the  _ sexy _ ones, or given the  _ right circumstances _ even the crying ones. In response to the pouting he only pressed another kiss to the elder’s forehead and caressed his thigh under his shorts. 

Myungjun knew what Jinwoo was doing, could feel the other’s repressed laughter against his back when he crossed his arms, full pout forming. He wasn’t upset though, nowhere near. His book wasn’t nearly as interesting as the things the younger’s fingers were  _ promising. _ But he also knew that Jinwoo liked this, liked the pouting and the game. He knew that his boyfriend had a cute fetish, which was why he wore loose lounge shorts and the just a touch oversized top. The younger’s eyes had lit up when he’d seen him and the subtle lick of his lips had been  _ worth it.  _

It was more worth it to see the other’s face when he clambered away from him, making sure to wiggle his butt just the right way even as his book dropped. He’d already read it once before, he didn’t care _that much_ if it ended up a little worn. There were more important things to be _worn_ _out_ in the moment. Jinwoo was predictable in the chase, grabbing his hips even as Myungjun looked over his shoulder to pout at him. He could easily recall a time this would have been a real fight, when he’d cuddled the younger only for him to not let him read. Things were different now. 

Glancing at the door Jinwoo licked his lips, he could feel the tension in the air just as easily as he could see the hunger in Myungjun’s eyes. They wouldn’t be fooling  _ anyone _ if they were to walk in, seeing Jinwoo with his hands on either side of lithe hips pulling them backward. Or if they caught  _ even _ a glimpse of dark, hungry eyes that were staring out over pouty, but begging lips. Mentally he thanked himself for locking the door after Myungjun had suggested watching a drama together, the small screen on the tablet was still flashing colors at them from the floor where he’d set it. The next episode was about to start. 

He gave in to what he wanted pulling Myungjun’s hips back into his own. He could feel his cock hardening, moreso than it already had been with the feel of  _ soft _ thigh under his fingers. There was a low whine from below him and all he could see was the nape of his boyfriend’s neck. He’d buried his head in the bedding, it was a nice sight with his shirt lifted to show just a sliver of skin. Jinwoo leaned down to run his tongue along the exposed skin at the collar, another whine followed. He blew on the skin watching the bumps rise as he felt hips pressing back into him.

“Do you…” He found the words were hard to say but also hard to swallow as dark eyes looked back at him. Auburn hair caught the light and he had to swallow at how pretty Myungjun looked like that, long lashes just dusting his cheeks, lips full and kissable. Yet he also looked adorable with just the hint of a teasing smile and way his body looked in the clothes he’d chosen. Jinwoo groaned internally about how unfair it was for Myungjun to look that sexy and cute all at once. He resolved that in response he’d just have to make the other unglued just as he was.

Myungjun bit back his yelp when Jinwoo didn’t finish the question instead flipping him over, they both  _ knew _ the answer. It was obvious, but he found he was still a bit nervous looking up at other male. He looked handsome, his face bare and the new dark brown looked  _ really _ good on him, but the view as better for the slow teasing of skin. He swallowed drily as the tank top that his boyfriend had been wearing was lifted, slowly at first with their eyes locked the question lurking there. All Myungjun wanted to do was give in,  _ he couldn’t, _ not yet. 

Instead he licked his lips and followed the trail of revealed skin, watching perfect nipples make themselves known just before the shirt was tossed aside. Jinwoo acted more confident than Myungjun knew him to be, but just as his boyfriend wanted cute this was what he wanted. Someone to control him. He would have wondered about the pair they made but all thoughts flew away with the return of hands along his own skin, sliding up under his shirt teasing. He lifted his hands to touch, the warmth they met set him ablaze.

He could see the same fire burning in Jinwoo’s eyes, intense,  _ hungry. _ The idea that the younger male wanted him that much made his cock twitch, he could see it now forming a tent between his legs, between their bodies. It  _ craved _ touch, but he knew that Jinwoo would make this last, he could tell just from the way his smile softened when their eyes met. It made his heart fall into place with a  _ squeeze, _ like an ache echoing the one calling to him in his stomach. But it also melted him, he  _ wanted _ to comply. He wanted to be  _ told. _ “Please.” 

Jinwoo knew, they’d talked about, what Myungjun was asking. It was a lot, to be in charge, to be in control. It wasn’t the same as it was for Astro or like being the leader. At this moment if Jinwoo told Myungjun to strip  _ he would, _ if he told him to suck him off,  _ he would. _ Anything to please him, that’s what he’d been asked to ask of him in these moments. But Jinwoo wanted to please them  _ both, _ wanted to make them both  _ get there. _ So he hesitated on an order, feeling the need for it build it. His own desire to give it building up as he worked off Myungjun’s shirt.

“Tell me what you want.” The words were a breaking point, he knew they would be, had been the first time. But he was still new at this, they were both  _ so new _ at this. He didn’t want to mess it up. Not now that he could finally have it. Myungjun nodded but said nothing for a moment in which Jinwoo put his lips to use on the newly exposed skin before him. He was care, pressing his lips or his tongue to the heated flesh but leaving no marks. He wanted to, seeing Myungjun covered in his marks was something he’d love to see. 

Myungjun tried to stay focused on what he wanted running hands over Jinwoo’s shoulders as he kissed his way along his chest. He could feel his need  _ straining _ against the confines of his shorts, he could feel Jinwoo’s pressed against his ass. He wanted it. But he wanted to be pulled to brink and pulled back down to reality even more. To be denied the orgasm so it could reach greater heights when it was granted. “Please Jinwoo, I want you.” Was all he could bring himself to say, rubbing against his desire as soft lips descended upon his own.

There was a sigh, a breath of air against his neck before he felt cold air down below. It was jarring, but freeing as his cock bobbed into the air. Then suddenly it really was in the air as he found his thighs on either of Jinwoo’s shoulders, his own pressing down into the bed. He didn’t hold back his yelp this time, looking up slightly startled and unsure. One look into Jinwoo’s eyes, honest and well known had him relaxing. This was what he’d  _ wanted, _ what he’d  _ asked _ for from no one else. Jinwoo needn’t ask if he trusted him, because he did. 

Still it was hard not to squirm at the soft, barely there kisses along his thighs. It was impossible to hold back the noises as the kisses turned to nips, while fingers delved along his ass, pressing inward but never going further. It was maddening, his cock was already dripping by the time Jinwoo’s tongue ran along it, slowly. Myungjun couldn’t do anymore more than whine and make grabby hands, wanting. But his voice was choked up on the  _ need, _ caught in the back of his throat just keeping him from asking. Unsure if what he wanted would be given to him. He still couldn’t let go.

Jinwoo didn’t mind that Myungjun couldn’t answer, when he asked again, if he were honest with himself he hadn’t been expecting one. Not so soon anyway. Not after Myungjun told him that he found it hardest to ask for what he wanted instead of _ giving what he thought was wanted. _ Or wanting to be told. “It’s okay.” He kissed one of the little red marks he’d left before lowering the thighs he’d been enjoying. He moved himself forward to kiss away the tears Myungjun probably didn’t want to cry. He understood, it was hard to understand but he did a little bit. And he would try to do more. 

“Really it’s okay.” He kissed away a few more tears and pushed away the thought  _ that Myungjun really was the cutest. _ Instead he focused on bringing the taller back to life, his cock flagging just a bit between them. Unable to stay up due to the pleasure and conflicted emotions. Myungjun was looking at him, shy and timid, until he kissed him. His tongue making its way around the elder’s mouth while he put his fingers to better use than teasing. Leading them into what he knew they both wanted. 

It was fast, his thrusts hard and short as he saw  _ white _ all too quickly having built himself up along with Myungjun. It wasn’t bad for a second time he reminded himself as he consoled the elder about how he felt he’d messed up. He hadn’t. And Jinwoo would continue to tell him so until he believed him. Which he knew might be longer than anyone might think, as Myungjun wasn’t as confident as he liked to appear. He was delicate in that way, if not many others Jinwoo was learning better. In ways that showed him more about himself. 

He would think about it later. For now he wrapped them up in the bedding he’d discarded. Instead he tried not to think about how upset Myungjun was going to be when he saw how many of his book’s pages were bent. The book having somehow gotten under foot when they’d changed positions a few times. He hoped it wasn’t an important book as the elder fell asleep against his shoulder, no longer apologizing. He told himself next time he’d give Myungjun what he wanted, without asking. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know. I went with it.


	9. Plans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I stressed???? HAHAHAHA is that even a question???

A date. Myungjun couldn’t deny that he wanted to go on one. It had been a while since he and Jinwoo had been out, alone at least. And when Jinwoo mentioned the idea, well subtly and with a lot of implication heavy in his voice he’d wanted to jump at the idea. Except he couldn’t, because they couldn’t. As Myungjun was currently on house arrest as the case against AllKpop had finally reached the courts and his face was plastered everywhere with Natalie's and her boyfriend’s. Apparently they were the first ones to not settle or get their case thrown out after the prelim. 

Either way it had pretty much left Myungjun either in the dorm or at schedules which was why Jinwoo had suggested a date, well other than wanting to go on. Myungjun was always down for that though and Jinwoo knew it. It was just a matter of working around his newfound public attention drawing. Even if Jinwoo claimed up and down that it didn’t matter, that it wasn’t like they’d be lovey dovey out in public anyway. Obviously as they weren’t even open about it around the dorm when the members were home.

Jinwoo was frustrated, Myungjun was teetering on the edge of saying yes to a date, a date that in his opinion was a long time coming. Since they’d been unable to actually go on one for a while. Being upwards of a month due to scheduling and the upcoming case, which was now the ongoing case. Either way he wouldn’t, couldn’t take no for an answer without starting a fight. Granted he didn’t actually want to fight, but he was willing and it must have shown on his face. Because Myungjun let out a long suffering sigh.

“Do you have a plan then?” Myungjun’s voice was defeated, as if he’d already tried thinking up something himself. Which Jinwoo didn’t really doubt, his boyfriend had suggested and planned many of their dates previously after all. Though that was before the trail and the company watching his moves more carefully. Which in the back of his mind had Jinwoo wondering if the company knew about them. There had been a few hints, a few probing questions, and an overall hands off vibe from them lately. Though he didn’t dare ask. 

“I have a plan.” Jinwoo could tell Myungjun was doubting him, and well he had reason to of course. The company had been fairly strict lately, though he’d gotten permission before asking by telling them that Myungjun was getting a bit restless. And with the guarantee that he’d be with him the whole time they’d agreed. Of course they’d also made him tell them where they’d be at as well as a precaution for any kind of media gag that might be needed. Jinwoo had assured them it wouldn’t. 

“Okay.” Myungjun sighed again, though this time it was completely fake. He wanted to go out, really he needed to get out. Being in the dorm wasn’t all bad but it certainly wasn’t all good either. He wasn’t one for being cooped up all the time. Even if Jinwoo was there, most of the time just an arm’s length away or less. Which was nice, very nice he admitted to himself thinking of the few private hours they did have. In which they’d taken full advantage of their proximity, not entirely to the extent they both wanted but close. 

“So when were you thinking?” He added since Jinwoo didn’t say anything else, instead still blocking his way to the fridge where he’d originally ambushed him. He wasn’t upset though, he’d only been about to grab a cold bottle of water not food. At least he’d told himself he’d only grab a cold drink but he knew he could eat, his diet was already killing him in that regard. The look Jinwoo was giving him was off putting though, as if he’d known what he was about to break his diet. 

“Now.” Jinwoo’s smile was wide, and his eyes sparkled with a light that said his intentions weren’t quite as innocent as just an outing date sounded. Not that he was going to complain about it, he’d seen a lot of his boyfriend lately but he hadn’t seen a lot of his boyfriend lately. Though he would like a little more heads up than only hearing about it at a little past noon. They’d been doing nothing much all day to begin with, well he’d been doing nothing much since they were free. Jinwoo was probably busier.

Still Myungjun had to swallow around the lump in his throat and the hunger that was starting to coil in his belly from that look. “Like hop in the shower and get ready right now, now? Or the you don’t even have time to change right now?” He questioned and he knew without a mirror his eyes were blown out and he probably looked a bit too eager. They weren’t quite home alone, but they weren’t far from it with Moobin napping and Sanha gaming, Eunwoo and Rocky were out with their manager. 

“Now, now.” Jinwoo smirked and pulled Myungjun’s wrist away from the fridge and along with him towards the door. There wasn’t exactly the chance for what he’d like to do in the shower, but there wasn’t any need for Myungjun to change. He was wearing the appropriate clothes for what he had in mind. Though Jinwoo wondered if Myungjun would appreciate the effort he’d gone through to set this up once they got there. But his boyfriend didn’t complain more than rolling his eyes and following him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be very, very slow updating this because lo and behold it stresses me out too...


	10. Hotel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...I've decided realism can take a back seat, as if it had one to begin with. That said I'm going to try to be nicer to myself this go round.
> 
> On a side note anyone else feel awful after leaving constructive criticism?

“Basketball...I can’t believe you took me on a date to play basketball. With our company staff no less.” Myungjun was huffing and complaining on the drive back to the dorm but Jinwoo knew he wasn’t upset. If anything his boyfriend was more irritated that they’d lost by like half a point. Still he listened to him rant a little bit because he knew it wasn’t the kind of date he’d been expecting. Which Jinwoo had only heard five times after they arrived, another three after the game started, and this made seven. 

“But you had fun.” Jinwoo countered with a playful smack to Myungjun’s arm, his eyes watching the road. He’d driven them himself just like he’d promised the company that he would to ensure that they were discreet. Though he’d seen less of the news everywhere about the lawsuit than he’d seen in a few days while they were passing news outlets on the way to the court. It was still big news though and they’d taken precaution at being recognized. When Myungjun didn’t answer Jinwoo smiled. 

It was another few minutes before either of them spoke again but the silence was comfortable. Something Myungjun was thankful for was how they’d grown a lot less awkward during the house arrest, though he wondered if the members were thankful. As it had them cuddling more openly in the living room or just being around each other. Though nothing too obvious, at least he didn’t think it was too obvious. There wasn’t anyway to find out with asking, which they were not going to do. 

“Aren’t you going the wrong way?” Myungjun ventured looking out the window noticing they most definitely weren’t headed towards the dorm. Actually he wasn’t sure where they were headed at all. Unconsciously he reached for Jinwoo’s hand between the seats, finding the warmth of it nice and a bit comforting at the idea they were possibly breaking the rules. Which he was all for, if they weren’t already skating them very, very closely by dating to begin with. Though there was no rule expressly forbidding it, there weren’t many supporters of in group dating. 

It was a thought Myungjun tried to avoid and he did so now by looking out the window again seeing what he could recognize. As Jinwoo hadn’t answered him, instead fading lanes in a very assertive driving move that fortunately didn’t require his hand back. “I didn’t say our date was over.” The belated reply had him glancing over at his boyfriend curiously, there were only so many places they were allowed to go. Well, he was allowed to go anyway or stay out really. The trial had barely started and he was already over it. 

“Not over?” He found himself looking back out the window and the sky, the car’s clock read seven and his curfew was a cool ten. Which he knew meant there was more time for a date, a real date and not just playing basketball. But he most certainly didn’t want to get his hopes up only to have them dashed. Still. “What do you have planned?” He couldn’t help the lifted eyebrow and the slight squeeze to the hand in his own. It wasn’t until he realized they were stopping he knew where they were. 

“What do you think?” Jinwoo’s voice was sensual and teasing all at once as he pointed to the left the of the parking lot they’d entered. Myungjun felt flustered as he followed the finger, his eyes landing on a not so unknown hotel branch. The same one he’d talked about briefly for their five star restaurant that was open to the public, that Moonbin had told him about while salivating. Granted he had also thought it sounded good and like a date worthy place. He just hadn’t thought Jinwoo was really listening at the time. 

Pulling his eyes back to his boyfriend’s he wondered exactly how much trouble they’d get in if they were found in a hotel together. Outside of schedules, possibly very, very naked. Or he hoped very, very naked. Swallowing was hard around the thoughts that flew through his head, but he managed to do so and spit out an answer at the same time. “I think I like what you have planned.” He smirked, raking his eyes over Jinwoo’s body behind the steering wheel. It still made him flush, as if he still wasn’t used to the idea he wanted him. “Well to eat right?”

Jinwoo smirked at him in response, lifting an eyebrow, and using a tone that said everything that needed to be said in his answer. “Yes to eat.” He also pulled his hand back reaching into shirt pocket pulling out a room key as he winked. It took everything Myungjun had not to scramble out of the car as quickly as possible pulling Jinwoo along with him. Instead he waited, since he could tell the younger wasn’t actually done speaking. “I told the company we’d be eating here,” His eyes did a dance as he spoke. “And if we happen to have more wine than we should because of stress I plan to tell them we had to stay.” 

“What did they say?” Myungjun licked his lips, it felt very important in the moment. The idea of staying, more than few hours in a luxurious hotel room with his boyfriend was tantalizing. Especially considering how long it had been since they’d had any true alone time together. Even before the trial had blown up it was still hard to manage with how awkward transitioning from friends to lovers was. Not to mention living in a dorm with four other grown men who were with them almost twenty hours out of twenty four. 

Jinwoo smiled, he could feel his heart beating faster at the way Myungjun was responding to him. He knew his boyfriend’s thoughts were in line with his own from the hunger in his eyes. But it was nice teasing him, making him want, in a way that he was okay with. It was something they’d talked about before. And right now the air was heavy with intention. Though he doubted it would last all the way up to the desk to check in. “They said it was fine as long as we didn’t over use the company card.” 

“We aren’t using the company card for the room are we?” Myungjun smirked and thought about the wine he’d order on the company dime and what would follow after. He frowned though when Jinwoo only gave him a crooked smile and pulled out his wallet. His jaw dropped, he knew the name on that card and it wasn’t the company’s. It just wasn’t someone he’d been expecting either, though he supposed he should have. 

“She told me she felt guilty.” Jinwoo put the card away with a smile, he’d have to remember to give it back to her without Myungjun noticing because she was around. Staying a few rooms over and allowing them the time together they’d never get on their own. If anything about their card statements said anything about booking hotel rooms together that would raise eyebrows. At least without excuses. After all, in this case it was a manager who’d suggested drinking until the problem went away. Which, because he was polite, Jinwoo hadn’t pointed out was horrible life advice. 

“Well, what are we waiting for?” At that he smiled Myungjun didn’t seem upset that he’d talked to his ex-girlfriend. Which was nice because it showed he really did trust him, and in a way he supposed it meant he trusted her. Of course she was suing a very large company over him just as much as she was doing it for her. That was definitely trust building in his eyes, though he said nothing more as they made their way inside. There was actually a reservation already made and the card was for extras.

Myungjun’s enthusiasm didn’t hold up any longer than Jinwoo thought it would. Not to say his boyfriend wasn’t rightly impressed with the decor or the ambiance the hotel offered even just on the way to the restaurant. It made his palms sweat actually to just walk in, even knowing they did have a room. But no one besides the hotel staff were supposed to know that. Which made sitting at the dinner table a bit more awkward than it had been in a while. Because every bite, every look, and every subtle move would have him thinking about what was to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...what do you think will happen?


	11. Final Act

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the end. I won't lie I got stressed about half way through, go figure. But I still liked the idea and forced myself along as I'm wont to do. That said I'll be taking a break when all my current works are finished. I'll be gone about a month and will not be posting any new fics. 
> 
> If you miss me I can be found
> 
>  
> 
> [@shinigamibutter](https://twitter.com/shinigamibutter)
> 
>  
> 
> where I won't be disappearing anytime soon.

Dinner felt like a tease. Or maybe it was that Myungjun was being a tease. His mood shifting the moment they’d sat down at the table, and his leg found Jinwoo’s under the table. Not that Jinwoo was complaining. It was nice, much nicer than the somewhat defeated look his boyfriend had been carrying around when they’d entered, as if the whole world were on his shoulders. It was a weight they hadn’t addressed, a weight they could feel between them even back at the dorm. But it wasn’t something he was going to bring up now. Instead relishing in the attention underneath the long table cloth.

Which wasn’t hard to do really, with the light conversation, still mostly nervous but also flirty. Jinwoo wasn’t surprised it took a few drinks for them to truly relax. As never before had they stayed anywhere quite this fancy, where their bags were taken to their room without them and a waiter offered a wine list without prices. Myungjun seemed to be enjoying himself, or more accurately what he was doing to Jinwoo. His foot caressing along Jinwoo’s inner thigh slowly working its way to up between his legs even between large bites of food or laughter. It wasn’t quite as distracting as the thought of what lay ahead. 

Myungjun could tell Jinwoo was distracted, and he knew it wasn’t just because of his feet working under the table. Though admittedly they weren’t working that hard, they were in public after all. It wasn’t like back at the dorm where Jinwoo could excuse himself with a boner and Myungjun could follow shortly after to take care of it. Because back at the dorm none of the members were paying enough attention to care about that. At least none of them had shown any signs of caring about it or noticing. Of course he wondered. 

Tonight though they weren’t at the dorm and they wouldn’t be returning there. Reminding himself of that sent a jolt down his spine even as he picked up his drink looking across the table at Jinwoo. They certainly weren’t dressed for the extravagance of the hotel they were staying in, though it hadn’t caused them to garner any attention. As they were plenty of other customers in the restaurant that were in casual wear during these hours. It was still pretty early, it was still early when they finished the check being added to their room tab as they headed to the room upstairs. 

Something about being in the elevator alone, knowing they were going to a hotel room made the air thick and Myungjun’s stomach twist. In a pleasant way, but it twisted nonetheless. His thoughts drifting to what Jinwoo might have in store as he watched his boyfriend nervously fiddle with the room key in his hand. They hadn’t said anything once the button had been pressed, and with how full of tension the air was no words would fill it. Myungjun knew that only action would. Actions he was all too willing to make, inside where it was safe.

Fumbling the key card wasn’t smooth or cool but that was just how it turned out when Jinwoo stepped up to the door his mind racing on how to fill the tension. How to break it, and do it right. He’d done it the wrong way enough times to know that it could still result in exactly what they needed or it could see them into a giggling mess. One that had to see its course through before they really moved on from it. He didn’t want that tonight, tonight he had plans and he wanted them to be perfect. So he let Myungjun step in first switching the lights on as he stepped in behind him locking the door. 

The room was large, with a sitting room and through a bedroom that could be seen by the king size bed alone. It was lost on Jinwoo, though he could see the look of wonder on Myungjun’s face when he pulled him back around to him by his wrist. Any words that would have been said were caught between them as Myungjun’s back hit the door, all the tension finding release against Jinwoo’s lips as he pressed them into his boyfriend’s. It felt like something broke as the air left his lungs filling Myungjun’s, their tongues meeting after mere seconds. 

Intense, was the only way to describe it as hands came up around his shoulders and Myungjun’s hips wrapped around Jinwoo’s waist. All of the teasing from the dinner table coming to a head as their bodies connected. And Jinwoo knew it wasn’t the elder’s thigh against his own that he was feeling as he pressed harder into the body under his own. It took very little effort to lift the lithe body wrapped around him from the door and walk further into the room, making a beeline for the couch, where he deposited his boyfriend. 

It took a moment for Myungjun to realize that Jinwoo was letting him go, pulling back and whispering something between kisses. Words that sounded suspiciously like we need a shower. He didn’t exactly want to hear it after the whole classic, possibly cliche, but still effective door kiss that had made his knees weak. Unfortunately Jinwoo wasn’t taking no for an answer and even in his not far from gone mind, he could tell the removal of his clothes was clinical not sexy. It didn’t stop him from pouting when Jinwoo did finally pull away. A louder, not kiss mumbled command falling from his lips. “Shower, now.”

Reluctantly he complied only ogling his boyfriend as he passed him by on his way to the open bathroom. It was huge just like the room and he when he glanced around he could see the money signs everywhere. But his eyes lingered on the sliver of skin as Jinwoo pulled his own clothes off before he started the shower. He got the feeling that things had just started and his boyfriend had a plan. Other than teasing him into a mindless state and forcing him into the shower. He wasn’t surprised when Jinwoo jumped in behind him, rubbing up against his back kissing his neck.

Jinwoo smirked at the way Myungjun responded to him, it had been awhile after all. The elder was obviously in need, his soft whimpers and subtle movements back into him were almost enough to make him give in. To take him now, and not wait. The feel of his naked and heated flesh against him was almost too much to resist, but he did washing himself quickly. He had more in store, so he held himself back even as he ran his hands over Myungjun’s bare ass. “I want you to prepare yourself,” He whispered against the elder’s neck. “Come out when you’re ready.” 

With that said Jinwoo slipped out of the shower to his boyfriend’s protests and his body’s. Despite the protesting he could see how excited Myungjun was, his cock standing at attention even under the hot spray of water. The sight was better than every wet dream he’d ever had up to that point, but he knew that he couldn’t go back in, if he did he’d forget all about his plans and give in to what he wanted. He was doing this for Myungjun, and he knew the elder would appreciate it once he figured it out. Even if he was whining now. 

Myungjun knew Jinwoo was up to something, had known the moment he’d forced him into the shower and barely touched him. Well, for them anyway. Still it excited him to have his boyfriend telling to prepare himself and that was all. He had a feeling, one he hadn’t wanted to pursue in case he was wrong but the feeling grew every second as he did as he was told. His fingers teasing himself to full erection as his other hand slid behind him poking at the entrance hidden there. Jinwoo had left a bottle of lube behind that he made good use of.

He noted the bathroom door was still open through the fog on the clear shower door. Smirking to himself he promised to make the most noise possible as he slipped the first finger inside, his body already hot and ready for more, worked up from the teasing and the wait. He allowed himself to imagine it was Jinwoo, his fingers steady and caring as they stretched him. Working him up further as he pulled his hand along his cock, moans slipping from his lips that he could almost hear the responding approval of. Almost, instead he heard shuffling in the bedroom that he blocked out focusing.

Suddenly he remembered this was how he’d caught Jinwoo, in the shower jerking himself off to thoughts of him. That thought had him catching his breath and almost cumming as he worked his fingers deeper inside, stretching as far as they could go. Pretending they were Jinwoo’s cock, thrusting into him in need. But gently, like he did everything so that Myungjun could enjoy it, tempting, teasing him, keeping him on the edge so long that he’d beg and cry out to cum. He could feel tears on his cheeks as he did his best to do it to himself. Jinwoo was better, Jinwoo was always better he conceded as he felt his fingers press forward. 

It just wasn’t the same as having Jinwoo do it. As his boyfriend always rained kisses on him, caressing his thighs, his stomach, nipping at him where it felt the most amazing. He wanted him so bad, and he was just a room away. Myungjun forced himself to focus on what Jinwoo had told him, to prepare himself. Because that meant he’d get what he wanted. Jinwoo’s cock shoved into his ass while the younger praised him and made him feel, made him feel like the most important person around. A feeling that was everything to him now that he had it.

A feeling he wanted and he wanted now. He turned the water off, watching it drip down his own body, a droplet falling from the crown of his dick. It was still aching with need, unable to find the release it wanted knowing Jinwoo was there and could give him what he truly needed. Stepping out of the shower he took his time drying himself off, not bothering to bring the towel with him into the bedroom. Or to put on any clothes. That hadn’t been what Jinwoo had asked for. He’d asked him to be ready, and he was. 

Or he had thought he was until he saw what Jinwoo had, his body bent over the workings of a knot a book in hand that had the image of a naked woman tied up on it. Shibari, the one thing that Myungjun had never actually expected Jinwoo to give in to. He felt tears pricking his eyes at the thought that his boyfriend had gone to the trouble of learning it for him. It had some of his libido going down, but not by much seeing as Jinwoo was also still naked, and semi hard. Probably from all the noise he’d been making.

Jinwoo looked up at Myungjun hearing the noise he made, something between a gasp and sob. It was very different from the noises he’d been making in the bathroom, moans, grunts, and a few small whimpers of his name. Those had almost drawn him in there, almost he still wasn’t quite ready even if the ropes were. He could see from the look on Myungjun’s face this wasn’t what he’d expected, but it was something he’d been wanting. Swallowing thickly past the lust at the sight of his boyfriend he got to work. Pushing the elder towards the bed and the ropes he’d gotten ready.

“I wanted to try this for you.” He felt more nervous now than he had in the restaurant. Myungjun stayed mute watching him as he instructed him to climb on to the bed and he joined him. “Lie still and we’ll,” He swallowed at the trust in the wide eyes watching him, his desire rising even higher at the compliant way his boyfriend responded. Eager would have the better word, and he felt eagerness seep into himself. “I’ll start now.” He decided unable to resist kissing the soft flesh in front him. Still, and waiting. He could see how worked up the elder had become but he still lay there as he slung the first rope around him. 

Each knot and movement was met with something like a mix between a moan and a sigh. Myungjun’s movements further limited with each new edition as Jinwoo did his best to work the rope around his boyfriend’s body in a gentle way, whispering words of encouragement and endearment as he went. Telling Myungjun how good he was doing even as his own hands faltered and slipped, unsure. The elder never said anything about it instead slipping into the space he wanted to be in, submissive. 

By the time Jinwoo was done Myungjun’s cock was weeping and so was his own. From all the contact and brushing against each other as he worked. The sight it left him with, Myungjun crying, hard, ready and begging was everything. He’d never have another vision quite like it, he knew because no matter how blissed out Myungjun looked this wasn’t his thing like he’d thought. But he was going to see it through as he moved the elder into position against his own hard cock admiring the view.

Myungjun’s body was covered in a crisscross of ropes, knotted and intersecting in an artful way. A way that left his pecs and cock a stark contrast of open skin against the colored ropes. His eyes were wet with tears that Jinwoo had kissed aways while the smaller patches of skin were covered in small marks. Nips and nibbles he’d taken of the flesh he’d been unable to resist, actions that had earned him small, meaningful moans. This was what Myungjun wanted, what he’d asked for. Though Jinwoo couldn’t understand it he was going to do his best, even in denying what the other was begging for. Instead of taking him he took his time.

Running his hands over the bound flesh, teasing, tasting, indulging in the body that was willingly helpless before him. As Myungjun’s arms were bound behind him, not too tightly. None of it was too tight, just enough for what his boyfriend wanted, needed. He could hear him pleading still even as he ran his tongue along a smooth expanse of skin. Taking his time, until he could stand it no longer. He gave no warning as he plunged in, his cock aching with its own need. He let out his own moans now as he felt how tight the other was around him, though it was met with Myungjun’s.

This had been what he wanted. Myungjun knew that it wasn’t quite what Jinwoo wanted from the concern hiding in his eyes even as he finally took him, watching him to make sure he was enjoying it. He was, his body was on fire with need and longing in a way he’d only dreamed of. Feeling what he’d always wanted to feel, controlled. Still he did his best to let Jinwoo everything was fine, that everything was perfect with his words and the way he rocked his body as best he could, without moving more than he’d been told to. Instead each thrust moved him, causing the ropes to move in a way he’d always thought they would.

It was everything when their lips met, Jinwoo’s cock balls deep into him as he could do nothing but lie there and take it. His cock was leaking all over them both and he was almost certain he’d cum even if Jinwoo didn’t touch him. He almost had while he was being tied up. Almost, but he wanted to resist to see it through to the end. And it was coming as Jinwoo pounded in and out of him, whispering praises against his skin, worshipping his body in a way that only Jinwoo could. Gently and with fervor. 

Jinwoo knew the moment Myungjun was at the edge, when everything became tight and he could feel the other’s body trembling against him. Bound, as it was, it convulsed against him as he found himself being pulled along with it. The fierceness of their release was so intense that they were nearly screaming as they shot white hot cum together. Then it was a blissful wave of aftershocks as he stared down into the eyes of the only man he’d ever love. And he told him so, unintentionally only to see him cry and say the same. In that moment everything was perfect.

Clean up wasn’t everything it was cracked up to be Myungjun decided as he slowly regained feeling in some of his limbs. The experience had been everything he wanted, probably more than he wanted in some ways. So far beyond his expectations he knew it would be hard to live up to this again. Though he got the feeling that if he really, really wanted it Jinwoo would do it again. Looking at the ropes on the other side of the bed and then Jinwoo’s side profile as he painstakingly went through them told him he wouldn’t want it any time soon. 

He’d gained more than a fulfillment of his kink, or the unexpected fulfillment of Jinwoo’s as according to his partner he’d looked cute like that. He’d gained the knowledge that Jinwoo loved him, not just because he was his type. But because he truly loved him, loved him enough to try things he wasn’t comfortable with just to make him comfortable. And he’d realized they were serious, very serious in all of this. More serious than he ever could have thought just finding out about Jinwoo’s feeling from a shower jerk off. And he’d realized too that he was serious, infinitely more serious than how he’d approached it. 

“Jinwoo.” Myungjun started watching his boyfriend stop his work to look at him over his shoulder, before he turned away. The rope burn and marks were eating at him, Myungjun could tell. “I want to tell them.” That stopped the other completely and had him looking back at him seriously, they hadn’t discussed it, they hadn’t discussed anything to do with anything beyond their feelings. And even those had been glossed over a bit. “I want to tell everyone that I love you.” He felt a lump form in his throat at the odd look it got him.

Still the younger nodded, a small smile over taking his face as he spoke. “You’re serious.” He smiled wider looking around the room at the book, the ropes, the bag he’d brought. “We’re serious aren’t we.” It wasn’t a question but Myungjun nodded anyway, he could feel his own smile overtaking his lips. “I never thought,” He wasn’t able to finish as Myungjun jumped on him kissing him as he straddled his lap. The way Jinwoo’s cock responded made him giddy.

Myungjun kissed him harder as he worked his boyfriend up, his fingers caressing the younger’s cock with great knowledge of how the younger liked it. Just until it was hard enough to slip inside himself, it felt just as amazing as it had earlier. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” Was all he said between kisses as he started to ride the other in his lap, careful hands helping along. It was then he realized they’d never quite gotten that far, because it was serious. But they were serious and he could feel the tears slipping down his cheeks faster than Jinwoo could kiss them away.

“I love you too.” Jinwoo finally said as Myungjun slowed down from his frenzy of need, their eyes meeting just inches apart before they kissed again. “I think I’ve always loved you, and I’d love to tell the world about it.” Jinwoo thrust hard upwards watching as Myungjun’s face took on the bliss of pleasure, his own moan echoing behind. This was what he wanted, what he needed but he hadn’t wanted to ask. He’d never liked hiding it, not really. But now they wouldn’t anymore. Still he pushed Myungjun off and told him to get on his hands and knees as he thrust harder into him. 

Without the ropes he was able to freely kiss along Myungjun’s back, running his hands along the marked flesh, his own knees would have rug burn by the time they were done. It didn’t matter. What mattered was how the elder moaned when his hand came around his cock, stroking it with each thrust inside. His name falling from plump over kissed lips as the room echoed with the slap of skin against skin. Dragging him to the edge and throwing him off in an explosion of white that once more shook him as they lay panting. 

It took them ten minutes to move up to the bed, tenderly Jinwoo saw to Myungjun making sure he wasn’t hurt as he dreamed about their future. It was something he wasn’t given to doing before. Now it was all he did, though this time, with Myungjun in his arms and their love known he knew he didn’t have to do it alone. Never again would he have to fantasize about the man he loved loving him back or wanting him the same way. Because he did. And they were seriously, seriously in love. The thought made Jinwoo smile as he shared it to Myungjun's perfect laugh, and sleepy mumble of 'romantic'.

Things weren’t settled and Jinwoo knew that as Myungjun started falling asleep in his arms. They had really just begun but Jinwoo was happy. Happier than he’d ever thought he’d be and Myungjun was happier than he’d ever thought he’d be. They were happy together and they were going to make it work, they were going to tell everyone and they were going to live the happy life they wanted. Together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well it was fun. I suppose you might miss me. But in the meantime you can just enjoy my old works. God knows I wrote mostly MyungJin. 
> 
> I have a poll running on my twitter about original works please vote there ;3 <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts appreciated. But be aware there is no plot here. Just me writing whatever I want to write. However I want to write it...


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